When lacking a decent place to enjoy alcoholic beverages free from interference, road fishing is a final option. This act consists of driving around the countryside with a cooler full of beverages, allowing all passengers to 'fish' out and enjoy drinks hidden from public view. Road Fishing is only recommended in rural settings.
"Dave's parents shut down tonight's plan for a party, so we're just going to go road fishing until something new comes up."
20π 2π
The road to treasure is trail of hair that runs from a guy's belly button down to his dink.
Girl: What do you want me to do?
Guy: Follow the road to treasure! Agush!
221π 49π
Quite simply the best place to go to find drugs. It's hard to get to, but once you're there, every single drug imaginable is available for you to order. LSD, DMT, shrooms, ketamine, heroine, cocaine, marijuana, all only a couple of clicks away!
The site uses virtual currency called bitcoins, which are as untraceable as money can get.
It's been called the amazon.com of drugs, but that's an understatement!
Just look up silk road(anonymous marketplace) and prepare to be amazed.
"Dude, I just ordered an 1/8th of shrooms off of Silk Road for 4.5 bitcoins!"
"Sweet, brah! I just got 5 tabs of acid for a little under 10 bitcoins!"
"Most triumphant, my brother."
252π 59π
The driver who insists upon constant lane-changing during heavy traffic in a useless effort to gain position in traffic. Often ends up wedged under a semi.
The road toad trying to get ahead of us is now plastered to the side of a Swift truck.
69π 13π
The act of vigorous masturbation whilst driving.
My morning commute was made more interesting when a trucker pulled up next to my Honda and smiled. The initial flattery I felt, believing to be caught up in a playful flirtation, turned to fear. Upon closer inspection, it appeared that the trucker was engaging in an act of wanton road milking.
19π 2π
Road head is sucking a guy off while he's driving. Hazards include decreased concentration in recipient of said blowjob, risk of sticky white stain on pants if your girl isn't a swallower, and of course getting caught by a cop
βUnofficial Guide to Giving Road Headβ
Road head is awesome. The adrenaline rush of flying down the road with a dick down your throat is addicting. You just have to trust your man's driving ability.
Build up to it properly. Maybe he likes you to tease him first, or maybe it turns him on if you just attack him; road head is not about you, it's about him. Yeah, give this definition a big thumbs down if you think that's sexist, but I'm a girl and I take pride in giving great blowjobs, and giving great blowjobs means doing what he likes.
Wet your mouth. I don't care if the only thing in your vehicle is a three-day-old can of Dr Pepper, chug that bitch. Work up some spit in your mouth, get on your knees in the seat, and go for the D.
DO NOT use teeth. Keep in mind that the owner of this dick is driving the car you're riding in. Make it the best blowjob ever. If you're good at it, a blowjob is better for him than sex. So look your hottest, suck him till he cums and swallow it. Nothing good ever came of spitting, and anyway cum is a great source of protein!
Follow this guide and I guarantee you your man will never fuck your pussy again, he'll like your tongue too much
My boyfriend plays Backroad by Corey Smith in his truck when he's in the mood, so I curl up in the seat with my head in his lap, pull out his huge dick and suck it like it was the last blowjob of my life. He scratches my back, pulls my hair and slaps my ass because he knows what I like. After he cums down my throat, he pulls me up to him and kisses me, and says "damn baby, that was the best road head ever! I almost said the L word!"
220π 44π
A group of shady men in beige trenchcoats and tall fedoras who carry stop signs, but appear to be doing nothing. Only other road crew workers are allowed to pass by them, and any information on the Milkman is strictly confidential to the group.
I am on the Road Crew. This is my stop sign!
7π 1π