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someone who thinks that they are a manbeast when they are actually a dojo boy
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Definition:Crappo
the word townie usually describes a person who has utter shit for brains, no individuality, intelligence or money, who thinks that he/she is 'hard' because he/she has probably started smoking and drinking at age 5.
individuals such as these can most often seen to be wearing(girls)crappy cheap tracksuit bottoms(brown, baby blue, pink)and matching coloured top/jacket , often with the words 'babe' 'superstar' 'sexy' or the name of a town that the individual has probably never heard of in their lives, whilst boys often wear either jeans and sport tops or similar looking tracksuit bottoms with horrible puffy jackets and will normally be seen smoking or drinking or generally 'looking hard'.
Girls will also have on ridiculous amounts of badly put on make up, usually blue eyeshadow and pink sparkly lip gloss.Hoop earrings are common as well.
These people listen to music such as blazin squad and usher, totall bollocks if ever there was, and go 'clubbing' in big groups, or herds once a week, wherupon they most likely set out to go clubbing, get thrown out after abput 5 minutes and wander around town after dark, smoking, after which they will tell all their mates 'yeah, we had wicked shit at deniros, we was all blinged up' which translates as 'we had great fun at deniros, everyone looked great'.
people like this often have a great hatred for anyone who is not as crap as them, for example goths, grebs, skaters, punks etc. and are often violent towards these parties, managing to fit the word fuck into practically every sentence.
'christ your a mingin' fuckin' greb man,yoo startin' on me, yeah, yoo startin'?'
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someone who wears fake designer sports labels, fake burberry or mackenzie hoodies (cuz it looks like its got graffiti on it), caps with the peak at the same angle as everyone else, wear fake gold bling and steal chocolate milkshakes from the local corner shop. knows about 10 words including 'innit' and 'orrite' so communication is tricky. if male, he likes to ride a bike designed for a child 10 years younger than him, with added trick bars which he never uses. If a girl, she will wear lots of cheap burberry perfume and makeup and hair that has been gelled or sprayed back, and will have HUGE fake gold earrings. Townies are not to be confused with wankstas, who are people who try to act like gangstas and listen to 2pac and 50 cent.
Townie: 'orrite bruv, i just jacked some chocola' milkshake from dat corner shop innit, da geeza is gonna be well miffed now, dat is the fif' milkshake i jacked this week innit.'
Townie: 'innit bruv, im gonna go rape sum fuckin 5 year old, la'ers.'
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Fuckers!!!!Full of it wen theyr wit their "crew" but scared shitless wen theyr by themselves. Give themselves stupid names and think theyr hard as nefink. Widely hated by every1 who is not a towny.
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people who live in towns, wear exactly the same clothes (girls: tight tops, hair pulled back in high ponytails using extensive amounts of spray, pedal pushers, white trainers, fake louis vuitton bags in which you can only fit a pe. guys: burberry caps which defy gravity and point upwards, addidas/reebok/nike clothes.)
they like to think they're very cool and hard etc etc, swear all the time and pretend to be things they're not e.g. non-virgins, cool.
as a group in general, they seem to have forgotten the existence of consonants. (dashes indicate missing consonants in their speech)
loke, she woz to-allie fi-, ma-e, yeah, and she woz so fuckin- fi-e, ma-e, ya shoulda seen -er, ma-e, innit?
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There are many definitions and they basically all say the same thing,mine will probably say exactly the same,but here it is...
MALE TOWNIE -
Head - Baseball cap,these are becoming more and more ridiculouslsy sized and coloured!
Hair...will not be any more that 2mm long,
Ears - Usually some type of metal around the ear.
Eyes - looking around for trouble...proabably intoxicated by something cheap,or stolen
Mouth - S**t,f**k,ya mum,stupid made up words that nobody understands but, if one townie says it...another one says it and before you know it we are all breadbins!
Moving down the body to the neck - cheap..fake..pieces of foil covered chocolate stuck together to make some "bling" or something they picked up from "da'n da markii'"
The hoody would most probably fit atleast 5 townies into one, this will be over the head...even if the baseball cap is on! and if everyone else has their tops off because it is the middle of august.
Tracksuit bottoms, in a whole range of colours, the trousers may never ever go past the top of their trainers, otherwise they suddenly become a grunger
The socks will be either from "da'n da markii'" or from a cheap clothes shop that their mum shops in.
Trainers,full stop! if they are not (apparently) more than £100 they will not be seen dead in them
All clothing will be bougth from "da'n da markii'" or stolen and given to them by their dad that never sees them or their older brother (was probably a townie)
The female townie...basic really act like a s**g,sound like....well, thats a difficult one to describe...lets just say, if they want to say something...it will be loud and be some form of cockney or extreme-commoness ,the earings...big enough for dolphins to jump through and look heavy about the smae clothing as the male townie
listens to a sad pathetic excuse for music
usually drinking 24/7 cheap cider that they illegally bought in the off license because they say they are 18 when they are really 13
think they can insult everybody, from every race, culture, abilities, success, individuality, etc
think you are looking at them all the time, and use this as an excuse to have a fight
will have missed most of their secondary education and have never even heard of further education,GCSE's are a waste of their precious hanging around on corner time.
will either end up flipping burgers or in prison. females...pregnant before they learn to spell contraception.
what do you say to a townie in a suit....
Will the defendant please stand
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A perjorative term of abuse we used to use at Oxford to describe the locals (ie non-students) who were generally viewed by us as dim, poor, unfashionable, dangerous and ugly. Maturity has given me a new perspective, and I appreciate now that actually we were the stupid c**ts.
Townie: Large doner with extra meat
Oxford student: Look here old chap, I think you'll find I was here before you
Townie: F**k off back home you stupid c**t
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