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Random
When a person's belly is fully of coffee they hit their belly like a bongo
My belly was so full of coffee I played the coffee bongo
A single (one) cup of Joe. Highly reactive with humans, radical coffees generally follow the steady state approximation, ie the quantity does not build up because it is rapidly consumed. Free radical coffee, that is Java unbound by monetary exchange requirements, is even more labile such that it may react with a given human multiple times.
By contrast paired cups of coffee are not nearly as reactive, although there remains considerable debate regarding the degeneracy of the orbitals (approximated as "pots") from whence they came; and, if even degenerate, whether coffee is indeed subject to Hund's Rule. Further study (and funding please?) is needed to elucidate the nature of multiple filled coffee cups.
"Hey Paul, could you grab Bobby Jo a cup of Joe for the seminar? He's running late."
"I would but it's already gone. Man that free radical coffee went like LiHMDS at a proton convention"
The author would like to point out that it is improbable (at best!) to use the word "whence" correctly whilst under the influence of radical coffee.
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When you have to uranate every five or ten minutes because you've been drinking too much coffee.
(Rick): {dialing telephone}: beep beep boop beep boop boop beep
{ring...ring...ring...}
(Rick's boss): Hello, this is National Plastics Conglomerate, how may I help you?
(Rick): Hey boss, can't come in today. Got coffee penus and I'd never make the 40-minute commute without pissing all over myself.
(Rick's boss): YOU'RE FIRED!!! ***CLICK!!!***
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A really delicious coffee that has the texture of mud
Hello hello try sloppy coffee really good yum big dick and pussy coffee sloppy coffee try it try it buy it fucking drink fucking fucking coffee
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Somebody who is proud of his/her (usually her) 'addiction' to coffee; somebody who never shuts up about how much he/she needs coffee to function, as if it's a quirky personality trait, or a hobby, or just something to make her seem like an interesting human being.
Usually a fan of Starbucks or some other shitty chain café; usually takes a particular type of coffee (Latté, Mocha, (worst of all) Frappuccino) and tells everybody that it's "all I ever drink."
"I've got to have a cup of coffee, I can't start the day without one! I can't do anything until I've had my macchiato! I can't help it, it's just who I am!"
"Shut the fuck up, you Coffee Cunt"
Coffee joint is like a joint, except it's for coffee. You roll a piece of paper and light the joint then light the stove with it. You then proceed to make coffee in a stovetop espresso maker. Coffee is not possible without the coffee joint.
I lit the stove with the coffee joint, then I made coffee in the stovetop espresso maker.
Coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee coffee!
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A selfish person who sneaks a cup of coffee before the brewing cycle is complete thus causing the finished brew to be weak and bitter.
Worse yet is when mutiple Coffee Felchers team up to make the final brew undrinkable.
In History:During the Battle of the Alamo a feral Mexican wolfboy known only as the Chupacafe was sent into the Alamo by President General Antonio López de Santa Anna wherein he would coffee felch from the American defenders' morning coffee thusly disheartening those brave Texans.
It is theorized that all Coffee Felchers are the genetic offspring of this feral Chupacafe and a woman named Irene.
(Sips coffee)...YUCK!!!,those goddamn Coffee Felchers have been at it again.(Spits out coffee)