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This is my 50th time adding a definition about my name.
John is the name of an awesome guy who is gets all of the girls. He's pretty hot, too. Toned body, bushy black hair, and brown eyes. What he doesn't have in body height, he makes up for in a certain lengthy object. John might as well be considered the second coming of Christ, he's perfect in every way, so much so that he's been single his whole life and crying as we speak because that probably won't ever change.
After some surfing on www.urbandictionary.com, he found that there are other John's out there in similar situations, and is down anytime to communicate with fellow John's about how women may or may not be constantly plotting against them for reasons so minuscule they might as well be non-existent.
John is also constantly mistaken for his inanimate counterpart, and discarded-half brother, the toilet. Women often find it funny to define Johns as shit for this reason. But John's can unite in strong numbers to overcome any and all obstacles, making them a force to be reckoned with. Beware, the John.
Anyone: I have to use the John
John: "Please stop referring to me as a toilet."
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The act of masturbating so brutally resulting in injury or belief you may have an STD
Man, I was johning last night hard and now it burns when I pee.
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A dark black nigga who cant pull no hoes or btcs hes lame who think he the shit but he ugly af and suck dick on the low HE GOT A SHRIMP.
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A fat sexy hunky guy who gets all the girls and push in the world.
Hey John can you eat us out please.
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John is a dumb person with zero good looks. John has black hair and brown eyes.He has really bad anger issues and you should most likely not trigger him.He will always love all the nerd stuff and you will most likely not want to talk to him. Unless you like stuff like Mario cart and stuff like that.If you want to be his friend than just be very considerate.Also he is pale and has a stupid smile.
John:I just got Mario cart!
You:(not paying attention) ya ya cool.
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A very nice funny and chill guy. His penis is big. He's perfect. Trust me I would know (wink wink) he is always willing to help a person in need. He's good with girls. A real gentleman, he's a class clown, he's a good person in general. He isn't a fuck boy although he seems like it but he just likes to act like it. He gets annoying but he tries to stop...he's a great guy. You should give him a chance even tho he's not the best looking.
Wow I really miss john, he's such a good guy and I want someone like that:(
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NOUN; Gods Gift To Women, Extremely talented in bed, his skills, talents, and abilities to pleasure a woman are second to none.
Can be confusing at times, he will talk to you for weeks and then just disappear.
John likes to give. Big hearted individual who will take off his coat and give it to someone who is in need.
John has a heart of gold, and last night he made love to me until I lost my ability to stand and walk. Thank god for bringing us John"
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