Random
Source Code

Jesus

Awesome and Sweet and Kind Son of God. The Savior of the world. Giver of Eternal life and Forgiver of sins.

Jesus is awesome

by AtheismSucksSatanSuckstoo May 13, 2009

153๐Ÿ‘ 128๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

A Jewish man with high ideals that came out on the rotten end of the stick. Contrary to popular belief, Jesus never proclaimed himself the "Son of God", and in fact was only seen as a regular mortal until the Council of Nicea in 325, where the Christian Emperor Constantine proclaimed that Jesus was indeed Divine.
His name, Jesus Christ is purely fictional as well. Jesus was his name, however the latter "Christ" was not tacked on until much later, "Christ" meaning messiah, and derived from the word Christos.

Jesus was part of a religious society that preached love and humility amongst other humans. The Jews, however, were a constant thorn in the Empire's side, and Jesus was seen as a political dissenter, and was sentenced to die so as to make an example to others. A funny note to Jesus' death is that
A) Being crucified was nothing special; in fact, mostly anyone that was seen as a political enemy of the Empire was killed in this fashion (so no, Jesus was not special in this), and
B) It wasn't actually a cross that he was crucified on, it was a capital "T". The top bar, making it look like a lowercase "t", was only later added by the church.

When Jesus was crucified, however, no one seemed to care, and everyone went about their lives. It was only when Jesus' brother James (whom the church denies ever existed) was killed on the steps on the Temple of Solomon that the Jews rose up against the Authoritarian Romans (See: Temple of Solomon; Temple of Herod; Titus). So in truth, no one really knew Jesus existed. He was just another man to all of these people, albeit a demi-prophet.

It wasn't until later that the idea of Christianity was adopted, by the so called St. Paul. The problem with Paul's story, however, was that he was a Gentile (non-Jew) in Roman employ, and created the Christian church for purely political and self-serving reasons. Most of what he based the church on is completely fake, and was actually stolen from other religions, i.e.:

1) Mithras, the soldiers' God, was born in a cave to a virgin to free mankind from evil
2) Egyptian theological drawings always used a halo, mostly to represent something to do with divinity and the sun

... and many other things.

So in truth, Jesus was just a man that lived, and died. Most christians are completely blinded by their religious dogma to accept this however, and therefore Jesus will always be viewed as the "Son of God"

Jesus was born, lived in a theological-centered society, and was killed. Now he's being used for political purposes, or for greed in most cases.

by Matthew Johnston January 8, 2007

28๐Ÿ‘ 88๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

The name of which we name all our children from henceforth, or there will be no second coming.

Jesus 2: Redemption Day

by captain fruit punch December 4, 2018

12๐Ÿ‘ 60๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

The single greatest person in the history of everything.

historian: Did you know jesus and Moses used guns to defeat the romans?

by The Great American August 13, 2008

135๐Ÿ‘ 282๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

Ewan McGregor

Jesus used the highground to defeat the Antichrist.

by Noobmaster6969420 August 26, 2019


Jesus

The reason the Romans killed Jesus was for his Frost Walker Boots so they could walk on water.

But... they forgot one thing...

His boots had Curse of Vanishing.

Me: Hey, Friend 1!
Friend 1: what?
Me: did you hear about the joke of Jesus and the Romans?
Friend 1: No?
Me: The Romans killed Jesus for his Frost Walker Boots so they could walk on water, but, his boots had Curse Of Vanishing!
Friend 1: You need mental help man.

by FireFox22396 April 10, 2020


Jesus

The greatest guy alive any girl would be happy to be with him.If anyone is even lucky enough to be his friend you should feel great about it because just being near him makes you cool asf

Damn jesus is just a hottie

by Tioshsjwk April 11, 2018

1๐Ÿ‘ 50๐Ÿ‘Ž