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When you fist someone's asshole then fill it with hot sauce and a cell phone set to vibrate, then repeatedly call the cell phone.
My cell phone bill is so big because of the Texas Chile Bowl.
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Arguably one of the best Super Bowls to date, Super Bowl XLIX (49) pitted the NFC Champion Seattle Seahawks against the AFC Champion New England Patriots, each playing for the right to become the sole champion of the 2014 NFL Season.
Pregame: Deflategate controversy, Bill Belichick's flip flops, "I'm Just Here so I Won't Get Fined." That's all you need to know.
Coin Toss: Seattle wins the toss. NE receives the ball first.
Qtr 1: Neither team scores. Tom Brady gets intercepted by Jeremy Lane.
Score: NE 0 | SEA 0
Qtr 2: NE: Brady touchdown pass to Brandon LaFell.
SEA: Run-in touchdown by Marshawn Lynch.
NE: Brady to Rob Gronkowski touchdown (and spike).
SEA: Touchdown pass from Russell Wilson to Chris Matthews.
Score: NE 14 | SEA 14
Halftime: Katy Perry sings & rides on things.
Qtr 3: SEA: Steven Hauschka field goal.
SEA: INT by Bobby Wagner leads to touchdown pass from Wilson to Doug Baldwin. Ten points now separate the two teams.
Score: NE 14 | SEA 24
Qtr 4: NE: Short touchdown reception from Brady to Danny Amendola.
NE: Julian Edelman catches Brady's pass for a touchdown.
Final Moments: SEA: Jermaine Kearse makes a deflected/bobbled catch at the 5-yard line.
NE: Rookie corner Malcolm Butler makes game-winning interception, creating one of the best (or worst, whichever way you look at it) game-ending plays in Super Bowl history. SEA coach Pete Carroll is later criticized for the call.
Final Score: NE 28 | SEA 24
Super Bowl XLIX is arguably one of the most exciting Super Bowls to date. On the contrary, most of its $4.5 million-dollar commercials weren't nearly as fun to watch.
Notes: Tom Brady won his fourth Super Bowl in 14 years, and his third Super Bowl MVP.
With this win, Brady is now tied with Joe Montana and Terry Bradshaw for most Super Bowl wins by a quarterback.
Brady also holds the record for the most career touchdown passes in the Super Bowl, as well as most Super Bowl appearances.
Brady and Belichick further heightened their records for most career playoff wins.
The Patriots became the first team to win a Super Bowl after being down by 10 points in the fourth quarter.
As of 2015, this was the most-watched Super Bowl to date.
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A smoking pipe/bowl filled with High grade marijuana and Lower grade marijuana mixed together.
Dude 1: Yo you wanna match on a bowl? I got some dank.
Dude 2: I'm down but all I got is some mids right now.
Dude 1: Fuck it, lets smoke a beef and broccoli bowl
Dude 2: Worrd.
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Foreign Bowl Syndrome (FBS) is a real and common disease among 78% of Americans, a statistic I made up for this definition, in which a person has to withhold a bowel movement (BM) because the toilet isn't the one at home.
Tim: "Damn bro I have to take a poop."
Chuck: "Well then just go dude"
Tim: "I can't just 'go' I have FBS!"
Chuck: "What's that?"
Tim: "Foreign Bowl Syndrome. I can't trust any toilet bowl other than my own."
Chuck: "You're an idiot."
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When you take a shit on the back of the toilet bowl in a shady gas station bathroom and leave it for the next person.
I had to shit so bad until I went into the bathroom and found a mexican cereal bowl.
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On February 3, 2008
NEW YORK GIANTS WON!
THE NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS LOST THEIR PERFECT SEASON! SO MUCH FOR 18-0 HAHAHA!
GIANTS WON 17-14!
SWEEET GAME!
:D
Giants finish the season 14-6
Patriots finish the season 18-1
Person 1-Yo did you watch the game?
Person 2-Yeah mangg Giants WONNNN Super Bowl XLII, YESSSSS!
Person 1-I KNOW IM SO HAPPY! PATRIOTS SUCK!
Person 2- Yeah they do! i love the giants and ELI MANNING!
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