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Dating someone that looks like your ex.
Second Helping: Jenny is now dating John, who looks identical to her ex Clarke. Coincidence? We think not.
When you want your pet named Gary to get a bath, so you strap a bomb to your chest in an attempt to scare him in to doing it.
Robert:“GARY, THERE’S A BOMB STRAPPED TO MY CHEST! IT’S GONNA EXPLODE IN THREE SECONDS UNLESS YOU GET A BATH!”
Gary:”Meow”
(Robert explodes)
When you only last 30 seconds when having sex with a girl
Hey Erik do you do 30' second jobs
No Jacob I last for like 5 minutes when I'm having sex, no 30 second jobs
The shitty-doings of General Smear continue to drown the students of Baulko. It started with the walls and students but at one point... he just could not hold it in any longer. Students. Teachers. Principal. AND ESPECIALLY the Janitor was smeared all over. Fortunately, following this disastrous attack, we can identify one particular victim and gain a 69-minute interview with the boy himself. NAMELY, Zuhair, or as his new name post-catastrophe, ZuShit. This momo dupe of a Bengali boy just wanted to learn about the ideal GAS laws, especially GAY loose(nut)sacks law. However, the general had other plans. ZuShit was surprised to learn he would not only learn the theory of how gas is formed but rather was given an unexpected practical on how gases turn into brown precipitates. Feeling like he had learnt a lo that lesson he gleefully walked out the corridor when he noticed something... a stench. Connecting the brown dots, he took a glance down at his feet evidently covered, shmeared and engulfed by the general's signature premium shit. he ran to confront the general who was shitting in the female cubicle as he was in a quite a hurry. The stench was simply too blasphemous.
Knock Knock!
"get out buddy i am trying to cook up tonight's dinner! please wait your turn"
"no you don't understand what you have done. my parents bob and sam will not accept me. they will sent me back to syria.
"mate i don't have time for this shit! piss off."
Saranyan: Damn bro i feel really bad for ZuShit.
Rishi: yeah no cap fanum tax ohio rizzler.
Saranyan: must be a shitty experience
ZuShit!: hey dont make fun of me guys!!!🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
Rishi: i think its time to let the public know general's true powers in the latest general smear (the second update: 25.04.24)
Second-cousin-four-times-removed (2C4R).
My second-cousin-4X-removed is a good person.
The second date dance is commonly known as when the guy preforms an agressive and weird dance infront of the girl to impress her. This usually happens in about 80% of second dates.
"Yeah. He did the second date dance and idk if i should go for a third date because he didn't do the dance right."
The rule goes as follows...
"If a food item falls to the ground and you pick it up in less than 3 seconds, you can pick it up"
*Friend drops an entire pizza upside down*
"three second rule"