Rural Dictionary

Facebook

Facebook (It doesn’t deserve a big heading)
A social networking site that makes it ok for people to stalk one another, lets teenage girls pose holding drinks with less than 1% alcohol, and makes even the dropkicks look like social suaves. A place where people pretend to have heaps of friends that, really they have only made eye contact with and a place where you can talk to that HAWT BOI at the bus stop without being a complete dickhead (because as we all know, saying something over the computer is much more acceptable than saying it face to face!)

And for those who say, “I just want it to catch up with friends that I haven’t seen in a long time” there might be a reason why you haven’t seen them in a while…THEY DON’T LIKE YOU! That or you are just a tool and think it’s ok to stalk people. And since when did going on the computer become cool?!?!

One of my friend’s said to me, “Oh my god! You don’t have a Facebook! Do you have a life?” Very, VERY ironic. I’m the one without a life talking to my friends on the phone or in person and you have the most fulfilling life sitting on the computer talking to your posse of BAAAAAAABY GURLZZZZZ!

Why would everyone want to know what everyone else is doing? “Oh boy! Cindy wrote on Shamus’ wall!” WHO GIVES A RATS!?! What an invasion of privacy! And then you get the kids “facebooking” (apparently that’s a verb now) at school. *sigh* will you ever learn? Oh, we can all see the point of talking to someone on Facebook when they’re sitting next to you… BECAUSE IT’S DIGITAL WHICH MAKES IT WAY MORE FUN THAN ENGAGING IN ACTUAL CONVERSATION!

It’s all in the name…FACEBOOK. A book of your FACE, not your breasts, 6 pack, or stiletto bearing legs! Who wants to comment on blurry photos of an arm, leg, ear, eye in your album “MY TOTS DRNKN NITE OUT WIF ALL MA CREW?” The answer to that…OTHER FACEBOOK LOSERS LIKE YOURSELF!

A social networking site…dear me, that does sound a lot like those dating services with all the desperate men looking for love and a good time. Oh yes indeed, everyone’s favourite social networking site, Facebook is definitely the place to be because you can be just like fat and greasy Peter on Lava Life reloading his profile every 0.18 of a second to see if anyone’s commented on his pictures (which have obviously been photoshopped) to see if anyone finds him remotely SXC or interesting. News for you greasy Peter and all-to-similar Facebookers, you are stupid!

I must give this complete, waste of time site some credit though…you are better than “slutsville” and “pimp-wannabe” Myspace. Having fake friends, mmmm yeah I can live with that. But rating friends, that is just RIDICULOUS! Myspace; where a normal conversation sounds like, “PLZ COMMENT ON MA HAWT NEW PICS BABEEEEEEZ! ILY MWA” And if one dares not to… “OMFG! WTF! U TOTS DIDN’T COMMENT ON MA PIC WIF ME DRINKING A CRUISA! YOR TOTS MOVING DOWN MA TOP FRIENDS! BIATCH” Nuff said.

In conclusion, sure, it’s ok to have a Facebook. Hell, someone made a fake one for me, probably so they could have another friend on their HUGE list (pfft, jerks!). But I tip my hat to the people that have not fallen into this trap. Not the people who have one who just haven’t become addicted; you’re good, but you’re still an idiot! I salute those who have phone conversations and go over to people’s houses to make verbal conversation. Hell, I’ll even salute telegrams if they’re bold enough. But there is no way that I would ever salute the self-obsessed boys and girls (notice how I didn’t say men and women, because these people are quite childish) that centre their lives on stalking other boys and girls. You are what I like to call…a moron.

Facebook loser: I have a facebook. That means I'm a moron

by sorry for the rant April 26, 2009

352👍 168👎

facebook

A online website that used to be a better alternative to myspace, but now has become just as bad with the recent addition of junior college kids & high schoolers.

its the perfect place to stalk anyone you have seen around campus now that there is a constantly updated "status" where one can post what they are doing that EXACT moment ie. showering, studying, eating or whatever....
now one can also tell everyone how they met each and everyone of their friends.. making it possible to pretend like you know someone you have never met in your life.

all of the above has just become a complete joke and people enter fake "status" entries and make up random inside jokes for how they met their friends like, "we hooked up in 1955 and it was GREAT!"

everyone girl it seems on facebook is married or a lesbian...

people try to make themselves look cool by belonging to random inside joke groups proclaiming how they hate greek, or hate goths..

'the wall' is the same thing as myspace comments... and thats the only useful part of faceboook. its a way to keep track of things you drunkenly did in college. you remember friday night only through the posts your friends made on your wall.

people encorporate facebook into everyday conversations.
when a person says something particularly witty or funny.. it will soon become a facebook quote.

"facebook quote of the year"

"thats totally gonna be my new facebook album default pic"

"facebook group war"

by SBKAT July 31, 2006

439👍 229👎

Facebook

What was once a beautiful social networking site,
until Mark Zuckerberg changed the layout, not once, (the first time was bad enough) but TWICE.
Most facebook users were starting to get used to the "New Facebook," and then out of nowhere, they changed it again.
The new homepage is very crowded, and it tells us information about other people that we don't even want to know.
There are over 1000 Anti-facebook groups, and over 50 million users in those groups.
The general message:
WE HATE THE NEW FACEBOOK.

You wake up.
It's a sunny 2008 summer. You log onto facebook, and at the top of your screen, it says:
"Soon, the new facebook will be the only facebook. try it now!"

Your thinking- "WTF?"

Then it happens.

There are reactions almost immediatley, and when you click on the group application, all you can see is:

PETITION AGAINST THE NEW FACEBOOK!
1,000,000 STRONG AGAINST THE NEW FACEBOOK!
THE NEW FACEBOOK SUCKS!
CHANGE THE FACEBOOK BACK!
WE WANT THE OLD FACEBOOK BACK!

and so on.

But, eventually, I think most people got used to the new facebook. Everyone still misses the OLD facebook, but we had to adjust.

A couple months later.......

"There will be a new home page coming soon"

Your thinking- "WTF? AGAIN?"

Then it happens. AGAIN.

This new home page is something different- absolutely cluttered with advertisements and useless information that we don't want to know. The home page is full of other people's wall to walls, status updates, and so on. We can barely tell what is what!

Then you click on your profile, hoping they didn't change the profile layout.

and guess what.
THEY DID.

It's just disastrous, what have they done this time?
they've combined the statuses, with the wall posts, with everything else you did.

YOU CAN BARELY TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOUR OWN STATUS AND OTHER PEOPLE'S WALL POSTS!

Mark Zuckerberg has destroyed Facebook.

by fbsucks March 16, 2009

41👍 16👎

Facebook

Some stupid community site that is slow as shit. Pretty much like any other community site where you can - upload pics, setup a profile, etc etc - it gives you such features though like becoming a fan of actors, musicians, etc and joining groups. theres a ton of useless shit on there like applications that overload the servers and make the site slow as f***ing shit, by the time a page loads a snail already made it across the border. FACEBOOK DELETE THE USELESS APPS AND ALL THAT STUPID SHIT YOUR LOSING USERS.

i hate facebook its the slowest site in the world. one of the reasons my friend broke his computer. f*** facebook

by TBoggard87 July 11, 2009

28👍 10👎