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A large country with a small population of people who cannot speak in normal terms and insist that "Australian" is an official language and despise those who can't speak it. The population consists majorly of South Africans and the rest are all "ship people". The real Australians, the Aboriginals, have been sent into exile by the government whom are too busy deciding on the extension of shopping hours.
"Ag, ja, Australia is taking all our brains man"
Spoken by a true South African
There are no positive examples of the word
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Australia is a nation that takes pride in beating other countries in sport, when in fact these other countries are 10 times smaller than them. Australians are also extremely racist. The native people, the Aboriginals, are considered stupid and permanetly drunk. Yet they are happy to have aboriginal people in thier sports teams, because of course they make an exception for that. Also it was the whities who first bought alcohol to australia, and gave to the aboriginies. Australia also suck up to larger and far more important to them, eg. USA. They think they are as important as the USA, and like to think that thier prime minister and George Bush make united decisions. Many people believe that New Zealand is part of Australia. BUt it is infact a whole sea away.
America: Come here, come on puppy, now sit, stay, attack iraq with us!
Australia: *puff* *puff* *nods head*
America: Good boy!
Australia and New Zealand (they're neighbours)
australia (yelling across tasman sea): we are so much fuckn better than you, in fact we are seex times better!
New Zealand: america's calling you, better go do what they say!
australia: sheet, really? *runs off*
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Also know as Peasantville.
An island in the southern hemisphere inhabited by former convicts from Britain and well as peasants from many countries other than England.
This incredible mix created a society obsessed with their own importance, beer and sport.
An average level of education in Australia is about second to third grade. For example, English grammar is not taught in this English speaking country. An apostrophe followed by an S, is considered to be plural. General knowledge of world's issues is zero.
The official flag of Australia is a dark blue singlet (affectionally called a "wife beater").
Australian national anthem is short and easy to learn: "Ozzie, ozzie, ozzie, oi, oi, oi". In actual fact the anthem did have a second verse, but it was hard to remember and was scraped by the parliament in 1996.
The melody of the anthem is non-existent. The correct way to sing it is to do so after consuming several cans of a pesticide (aka local beer).
Favourite pastimes of Australians include, but are not limited to:
Getting drunk at work, getting drunk after work, getting drunk instead of work, getting drunk at football, getting drunk at football, getting drunk at football, talking about mortgage rates, getting drunk at football.
Australians love the "brown land of ours". They express their love by throwing rubbish out of their car windows and going on holidays to Bali, where the beer is cheaper.
They dislike all other countries and feel superior to any other nation in the world, and yet they think American and buy Chinese.
Australia has a rich culture, which includes horse racing and two codes of football; Rugby and Australian Rules Football. The latter is an immensely popular game (in the state of Victoria that is) and according to Victorians it should replace all other sports in the world (with the exception of horse racing).
Australians per capita are the highest gambling peoples in the world.
Victorians hold the record in being the highest polluters per capita in the world.
The Australian dream is to possess a crap looking, badly build house (6 to an acre) and one day become the 51 state of the USA.
Australia? Where's that?
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good place with bad people. they think they are the best at everything, very dumb and very proud.
they think they are the best at sport: soccer(they fluked into the world cup), basketball(they import rejected players from america), afl(the most ripped off sport EVER), rugby league(no one care bout league), rugby union(they only won once, NZL can rape them), swimming(no one cares bout swimming cuz we realize we are land animals), and finally(drums) cricket!(there good but most of the world only know it as a insect and only india likes it)
they say that they hate USA but they copy everything off them(including their style), they try to be "kool" and say "yo yo yo yipi yo bro" or "fully sick bro". they love eminem and his style(which only white people think is gangsta). they copy americas songs and always have the same chart psoitions. they also copy american shows like, australias got talent, australian idol, australias funniest home vids, and about another "every show is ripped off from usa" the only one they made is that crap dancing wit the stars.
they all have IQs of -3 to -1 and all the smart people are asians living in aus. they are dumb cuz their grandpas and grandpas are all convicts(prisoners). they try to make fun of america's dumbness and only make fun of the absolute dumbest people in usa. they try to hide their retardedness but they all know it deep inside their small brains.
they are the most racist people in the world. always make fun of lebs and asians after they get bashed by them. especially in the bars where anyone who is white and have low IQs get gang bashed like 30 people on 1 person.
they are so proud of themselves. finding a drunk at 9pm is like finding a person at 9pm. they think aus is the best country in the world cuz they only compare themselves to countries like nigeria, iraq and other poor countries. australia loves to brag about their success with other low, weak and poor countries, they never say anything about a loss except when they lose against the best. other than that they always find excuses(cough...hewit, socceroos).
this is a great land(white skies, green lands and blue seas) filled wit bad people. they are always up themselves and avoid or find excuses for anything that is better than them.
now asian respecter kevin rudd is on and he will help china conquer australia
Drunk Australian: "ozzy, ozzy, ozzy, oi, oi, oi!!!"
Person: "???"
Drunk Australian: "ooooooooiii!! shad ap u azn!!hhahah!ahaha!"
2 minutes later
Australian ends up in ambulance.
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The coolest place in the world, filled with the most coolest people in the world. Santa Clause's summer home is located just outside of Cairns, Queensland. And the whole shark attack thing -- myth!
Me: Wow! This Australia place is SOOOO cool! I never want to leave.
Aussie: Yieh, aur kuale's aer haepy. Aind aur sherks aer frindlee, mite.
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Known on the show "Starter Wife" they call Australia the vagina. If you don't believe me, watch the show.
Guy: Wanna get down an' dirty?
Girl: Excuse me, my Australia is closed for the season.
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Best country/continent in the fuckin' world.
Hot chicks, excessive beer, and more fucked up (yet edible) animals than you'll find anywhere.
Bazza: G'day mate, what'd you get up to last arvy?
Wally: Aww not much mate, shagged the hot sheila from the pub after grabbing a few beers and had a barbie for brekkie. Gotta love Australia.
Bazza: Too right mate.
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