Feral End Users

End users that have been without dedicated IT support for too long, in an environment that is more complicated than the average end user can be expected to troubleshoot. This situation is why you have people photocopying monitor screens, or everyone in a dept. using the same email password(bonus points if it includes "1234" or "password".

That office is a write-off - Full of Feral End Users, as their IT admin quit 2 years ago. It would be cheaper to rip it all out and start from scratch.

End up with Cucumber on my face

If your name is benjamin you may say this instead of egg.

When a colleague slaps your face with cucumber you can say it... Oh no i've end up with Cucumber on my face