Put my furniture back before I beat yo ass

1. An expression a parent, guardian, or friend uses to tell another person to put down their furniture or there will be consequences

2. An expression people yell when somebody tries to hit them with their own furniture

1. John: *sees his child using a chair to charge at his older brother*
"Put my furniture back before I beat yo ass!!"

Child: Ok.

2. Fred: What do you have in your hand?

Justin: A treasure chest.

Fred: And what were you about to do with that treasure chest?
Justin: Hit you with it.

Fred: You know what you can do with that treasure chest?
Justin: What?
Fred: Nothing! Now put my furniture back before I beat yo ass!!!

Looks like [his] face caught fire and someone put it out with a shovel

Description of an ugly person.

He looks like his face caught fire and someone put it out with a shovel! I fell off my bike. Twice.

14👍 13👎

He STILL doesn't put away his playthings afterwards!

What a chick grumbles to her family/friends regarding da clueless indolence of her main squeeze, and is referring to da fact dat he does not bother to re-dress her upper torso after a boobs-savoring session, simply walks around da house naked after an interval of between-his-legs-based recreation wif her, forgets to straighten up da bed after a bouncy-bouncy, etc.

My new guy is a total "Mr. Cuddly" and never makes me feel left out or unattended, but he hasn't "grown up" as far as childhood unawareness is concerned --- he STILL doesn't put away his playthings afterwards!

3👍 9👎

Can I put my cock in your stupid mouth

When ur angry whit someone and you still want them to give you a blowjob

Mark: Interrupts class
Teacher: Hey Mark any question?
Mark: Hey teacher can I put my cock in your stupid mouth

(On the work mark gets to the boss)
Mark: Hey boss
Boss: what is it mark
Also Mark: Can i put my cock in your stupid mouth?

(Mark gets arrested and it's in court)
Judge: You shall pay what u have done
Mark: Can I put my cock in your stupid mouth?

3👍 9👎

Can i put my balls in your jaw? Balls in your jaw. Can i- Can i?

Can i?

Can i put my balls in your jaw? Balls in your jaw. Can i- Can i?

19👍 3👎

can 🥺 i 🥴 put 😯my 🙃balls 😳 in yo' 🥶 jawws 😵

This is a slang for you wanting to do CBT with a partner, whether it'd be a wife, husband, or anything in between.

Person 1 : Heyy babe, feeling horny.
Person 2 : can 🥺 i 🥴 put 😯my 🙃balls 😳 in yo' 🥶 jawws 😵 ?
Person 1 : Hell yes.

9👍 7👎

I can't put a patty on a bun, with lettuce, cheese, onions, tomatoes, ketchup, mustard, pickles, and top bun together in that order!

a gift from above

I CANT FUCKING DO IT. THIS SHIT IS SO HARD AND SO BULLSHIT. I can't put a patty on a bun, with lettuce, cheese, onions, tomatoes, ketchup, mustard, pickles, and top bun together in that order!