miserable failure

1. According to yahoo: the 43rd president of the United States.
2. According to google in 2007: the 43rd president of the United States.
3. George W. Bush (not George H.W. Bush)
4. The most notorious Google Bomb
5. Variant of Epic Fail

Person A: That person over there is the most miserable failure.

Person B: Are you talking about the former president?
Person A: Yes, the 43rd

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Epic Failure

Olivia Calistri

Olivia Calistri performs actions which can be construed as 'epic failures' multiple times daily.

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epic failure

Top 5 reasons why you fail
1. You rolled a BE Lock
2. Your on Coilfang
3. Punctuation
4. Spelling
5. You have horrible comebacks and are retarded.

Your response is a #5. (epic failure)

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Fog Of Failure

When a bathroom air freshener doesn't quite do the trick. Instead of a lemon scented bathroom, you get lemon scented shit.

Do not go in the bathroom. It is filled with the "Fog Of Failure."

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Failure Grips

A contemporary and more appropriate term for "love handles," which no one actually loves.

I love how people try to slap a nice coat of paint on things they don't like, and then try to pass them off as something other than they are.

"They're love handles, and there's just more of me to love."

No, they're more like failure grips, and the space alloted for you to occupy has been exceeded.

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failure to launch

To plan an event down to the very last detail, only to be blown up in the end by a single variable gone wrong.

Suzy: Ok, got my cell phone, keys, car, and purse. Good to go! Me and Mark are going to have so much fun!
*Ring Ring*
Hello?
Mark: Yeah, uh... I can't make it to the party. My mom broke her leg and I have to take her to the hospital. Sorry.
*Click*
Suzy: *calls her BFF*
Danielle, Mark is blowing off the party! *cry cry*
Danielle: Girl you just got a failure to launch.

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epic failure

A failure of such proportions that it takes an extra word at the front to fully describe the magnitude of the fail.

Person 1: "I did a backflip off my house onto my trampline and landed it. Then I jumped off the trampoline and broke my ankle"

Person 2: "Epic Failure"

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