shoe laces

An expression used when someone is always up on somebody, sweatin' them.

Dang, look at Veronica's shoe laces hanging from Rashad's ass!

6👍 11👎

Lace curtain

A type of censorship exercised by feminists to suppress the publication of opposing views.

My letter to the editor about discrimination of men never made it through the lace curtain.

2👍 3👎

Strawberry laces

The act of a girl having her period during sex, thus making the pubic hairs on the vagina red and stuck together like strawberry laces. Then the male partner then sticks his tongue into the gooey warmth of vagina causing many groans from his partner.

SPLAT SPLOSH TRICKLE

James: oho! Strawberry laces? Nice...

Slurp. Splish.

Susan: oaaoohaaao YES YES YES!

Next morning

James: Susan gave me strawberry laces and she moaned like a wilder beast

7👍 13👎

lace me

When you want someone to tell you the latest gossip and secrets

David: Aye, you saw that fight during lunch?

You: Yea, what was that about?
David: I know exactly what happened
You: Alright, lace me bro

5👍 10👎

lace curtain

It's when you take a slice of swiss cheese, drape it over a woman's vagina, and then eat her out.

Guy 1: "Hey man, did you see that girl last night?"
Guy 2: "Fuck yeah, she was so hot I'd give her a lace curtain on the first date. AND I'd let her eat the cheese."

Guy 1: "That is so beautiful, man."

25👍 109👎

laced mutton

A vain, ignorant, and superficial middle-aged woman who unsuccessfully attempts to make herself look youthful by caking on make-up and by wearing the trendy clothing of college-aged females. This phrase is actually an older popular characterization which one occasionally encounters in classic literature and especially in Golden Age British mysteries.

Check out that noxious old heifer -- laced mutton of The First Water.

2👍 5👎

Lacing Up

Staying the night at an attractive young lady's house (who happens to have the IQ of a goldfish, and is dating you). Then, breaking up with her the next morning, after a night full of sticky fingers, and play. Oh, and of course, board games. And Twister. And of course, youth group the next morning. And baking cookies. And lying on the couch. And we cant forget all of her friends coming over. And lastly, her orgasming so hard that her newly died, stapled in hair flies out.

Wow. Garrett's gonna have a long night. Hes Lacing Up.

6👍 17👎