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The condition of having a laptop whose battery is continuously dead. Usually caused by laziness and neglecting to move the charger to the current workspace.
Dave: *Opens Laptop in Important Business Meeting* Excuse me folks, my laptop appears to be suffering from "Dead Laptop Syndrome" if you will excuse me while I go get the power cord.
Attendees: *Face Palm*
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The self-created genre that MC Lars describes his music as.
MC Lars is the originator of "post punk laptop rap"
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A white person who appears to be liberal in theory but is secretly racist, homophobic, ableist,classist, etc in practice.
Someone who can quote Audre Lorde and has a “Believe Women”, “BLM” and “Abolish ICE” sticker on their laptops but will refuse to actually believe women of color when being told that they are using their white privilege to harm rather than to heal.
People who pretend to be woke by putting virtue signaling stickers on their laptops but do not actually stand for those values when it comes down to it.
Example:
White Person: *does something racist*
Person of Color: Do you have capacity to talk about why that felt racist to me?
White Person: No, also I’m not a racist.
Person of Color: Okay, when will you?
White Person: It’s my “boundary” that you stop talking.
#SoundsAboutWhite
If you believe in systemic racism why do y’all act so furious and defensive when people of color express to you personally that something you did was racist?
Like how do y’all Laptop-Sticker-White-Liberals believe all the science and numbers and history of systemic racism but the buck stops when someone expresses you’ve personally been racist it’s just suddenly unfathomable?
Racist actions can happen whether you intend for them to or not. You can’t just deny something is racist to a person of color and shut them out just because it’s too uncomfortable for your fragile white ears to hold onto. And it sure as hell isn’t a boundary to silence queer brown voices post you hurting them.
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Definition A: When media organizations, prominent people (or both) claim there is no evidence for something despite the opposite being true.
Definition B: When media organizations, prominent people (or both) claim that something true is actually false or misleading in order to perpetuate a preferred narrative.
Media Organization: " The damaging video being shared online which shows the President in a bad light is fake"
Person: "It's literally the same unaltered video that your news organization shared LIVE two hours before you realized it was damaging to your Party's narrative. STOP LAPTOPPING US, you're insulting our intelligence and destroying YOUR credibility
When you sit on someone's lap until you get uncomfortably warm
We weren't having sex I was just laptopping her
The golden laptop refers to Jaden Reid's laptop being spray-painted in gold, and then the participants that are painting trace their dongs onto the laptop. They hide under the table until Reid sits down, then the participants jump out and skull fuck him until he has a phobia of laptops and the colour gold.
Man should be do the golden laptop to Jaden Reid
The Golden Laptop is a fun game where you spray-paint someone's laptop gold preferably JR. To begin the game you have to run over to the person (JR) and shout "Golden Laptop". This gives the person who shouted Golden Laptop the chance to pin the Person (JR) and do whatever you want to him. This could be anything and everything preferable stuff like setting his pubes on fire, stapling his eyes shut, or even đź’€f***ing him.
Person 1: "I'm kind of bored right now, I don't know what to do".
Person 2: "We should play Golden Laptop, when JR leaves let's paint his laptop gold".
Person 1: " He's on his way back".
JR: " Who the f*** painted my laptop gold, I'm f***ing kill you".
Person 1: " GOLDEN LAPTOP".
Person 2: " I called dibs on ripping his toe nails off".