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Fought October 26th, 1813, between the American forces under the command of Genl. Hampton and an entirely Canadian force under the command of Charles de Salaberry.
De Salaberry divided his force of 1500 Canadian regulars, militia and indians, between 5 lines of defence, constructed out of wood, known as Abatis. Using the river to cover his left flank, and the forest to cover his right, de Salaberry awaited the inivitable American attack. As an added precaution, he also destroyed the bridges leading to the defenses, which would make it impossible for the American Artillery to join in battle later.
The Americans were aware of his position, and made plans to flank it. One brigade, with 1500 soldiers, crossed the Chateauguay river and proceeded through the wilderness without a road or usefull guide. It wound up spending the entire night on the march.
When the fighting commenced, the Americans engaging the first abatis were unable to scatter its defenders (although a skirmish line before the defenses withdrew at the opening of the battle). Meanwhile the other brigade across the river found itself assailed by two companies of Canadian militia, and under fire from more soldiers across the river.
Despite being horribly outnumbered, (out of a force of 1500, only about 320 actually participated in the fighting), the Canadians convinced the Americans that they, in fact, were the ones outnumbered. Using the force's trumpets, the Americans were made to believe more soldiers were advancing unseen through the woods.
This, plus the Canadians' feisty defense, compelled Hampton to withdraw his army. In the process, he also abandoned the bridade which had crossed the river the previous day, forcing them to construct a bridge to escape later.
In a rather embarrassing event, a number of American officers were seen asking for assistance to cross the river, having abandoned their troops in the woods. These officers were ignored.
After the battle, Hampton revealed that his force had taken some 50 casualties. Other estimates probe far higher, but the Canadians themselves offer the best guess at America's loss, documenting that they buried more than 40 American dead. Canadian losses were officially 2 dead, 17 wounded, and a number missing. However, other documents place dead ranging from 4-5, wounded from 17-22, and up to 5 missing.
According to legend, the Canadians who formed the skirmish line before the abatis, camouflaged themselves with cloaks woven from fallen red maple leaves.
kid: "What's the battle of Chateauguay?"
guy: "A disaster for the Americans; a forgotten triumph for Canadians."
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Battle-Jesus is the modernized savior from old. This version of Jesus tots a handgun, and tots an Uzi. Instead of the peaceful all-loving savior we are used to knowing, Battle-Jesus faces you with fire and brimestone. Destroying the sinners, and cleansing the world of all evil. This meaning that only hippies will be left, because they just sit around and smoke dope, and love the trees. And the bible aint saying nothin bout tree-sex.
Though, there have been, of course, varied versions of Battle-Jesus made throughout the course of history. Most notabley, a GI Joe Jesus figure.
Battle-Jesus!
Battle-Jesus is here.
Battle-Jesus!
Sinners cower in fear.
Battle-Jesus!
Armageddon on your Doorstep.
Battle-Jesus!
Death 'til only hippies are left.
Battle-Jesus!
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The game that's flying off the shelves in Game Stops all around the country.
Caller: Do you have any copies of Battle Toads left?
Employee: No, now stop calling.
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When two people are licking each side of an erect penis shaft. They lick and suck their side of the shaft in an effort to get the guy off who is getting shaft battled. The person getting his/her dick sucked is the one getting his/her shaft battled over, and he/she decides the winner, and who subsequntly gets the load. One may challenge another to a shaft battle, as long as they have a third party shaft to battle over.
Joey challenged Shane to a shaft battle, so together they shaft batled Jordan. Joey won and got the load.
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The fight which ensues in a public or office restroom with multiple stalls over which occupant will win the right to poo in privacy.
It is a general rule that the first occupant shall be the victor and a newly arriving poo-er must concede the entire restroom and come back later. However, there are times when a new poo-er cannot postpone or doesn't have the couth to wait...thereby commencing a Poo Battle.
Corporate Office Worker #1: "I was in the poo stall (back of the bathroom) and some heffa came in and sat quietly for several minutes waiting for me to splash and dash! Too bad, I was there first! I won that poo battle"
Corporate Office Worker #2: "Damn, that is beyond rude! We should post a sign in the stall about the rules for pooing!" I'm fixin' to go poo soon. I WISH somebody would battle me! <office workers high-five each other>
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When a man goes out drinking and becomes aroused but cannot convince a woman to pleasure him, he goes home to masturbate and finds that his penis is flaccid. He then "battles" his dick until it gets just hard enough to come.
Pete went out last night and was chatting up a hot chick, but she was having none of it so he had to go home for a battle wank.
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the last major offensive of the german SS takeing place in the Ardennes forest where the germans sourrounded the 101st Airborne division near the town of Bastonge and where Anthony McAliff made his famous remark of "NUTS," Also this is where the Waffen SS killed many American prisonors.
German soldier, "Surrender"
McAluff "NUTS"
McAluff's fanous response at the battle of the bulge
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