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A text message hand job is when you are getting the "run around" from friends or family thru text messages. When you call no one answers or the reception is said to be very bad or they are in a dead zone.
Tom: hey billy,I tried texting todd and sue to see what they are doing tonite, but they text back they aren't sure, todds gonna check with sue, and then sue told me she's gotta check with todd. typical saturday night text message hand job !
billy: fuck them man! lets get some bank and hit the strip club, nothing but real handjobs going on there !
Tom: Hells Yeah ! !
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The rule stating a DOUBLE TEXT is ok AS LONG AS the second text message is sent within 5 seconds of the first.
I double texted Shelly, but it was ok cuz I used the Five Second Rule of Texting.
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A person who makes money from screenshotting Reddit posts and using Text-To-Speech to read those posts
Have you seen that new Text-To-Speech Reddit Youtuber?
Yeah, i hate Text-To-Speech Reddit Youtubers.
Same
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A phrase used to point out that a friend is constantly texting rather than giving their full attention to the current social situation. It is like they are there but not there.
*While watching the hockey game*
Ted: Damn, Sergio! You have been texting the entire period and have missed every goal. You are texting your life away!
Sergio: *silence as he is busy texting and didn't even hear the comment*
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When you have zero control over the text messages that you are sending. And you continue to text with no response stating all kinds of ridiculous things to the person. Do to your inebriated state. And typically in the morning you have zero recollection of saying the things you did.
"Hi! I'm an astronaut". " You tool you are not responding to me" " You want to have intercourse.??" Still no response"??? "I hate you". "I love you". Next morning... Hi!! I appologize I have drunk text tourettes syndrome and I have zero control over what i say or do.
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A cellphone text that's been sent by someone you think is drunk because it's incomprehensible, but you're not sure and you don't want to offend them by asking if THEY'RE drunk.
Person A: "Yeah were somewhere gone off now. where u at?"
Person B: "Dude, your text is drunk. Call me."
Typically, victims of textual harassment are most prone to suffer from post traumatic text disorder. Excessive strings of single-sentence or even single-word texts are the most common cause of PTTD. How uninteresting or irrelevant a text or string of texts are is positively correlated to their propensity to traumatize the receiver. Also, the earlier or later in the day these texts are sent, the more likely they are to increase the severity of PTTD symptoms. The signs and symptoms of PTTD are:
-having startled responses to text alerts
-ignoring all received texts due to fear and/fatigue caused by the individual textual harasser
-engaging excessively in activities prohibitive to phone use for the very purpose of avoiding texts
-googling how to block messages without blocking calls
-dreaming of traveling to the location of the textual harasser, smashing their phone, and leaving
Example:
Joe receives sports updates from his friend every single day as early as 6AM and as late as 1AM. Joe starts telling his friend that he's going to sleep earlier and earlier, hoping his friend will be courteous and not text. Joe's friend (the textual harasser) is not courteous and still texts. Joe silences his phone and begins to ignore all texts. Joe feels bad about lying, and instead of confronting his friend, he actually goes to bed when he says he's going to bed.
Joe starts to sleep 12 hours a day, develops bed sores, chronic back pain, and his marriage falls apart. Joe becomes the first person diagnosed with Post Traumatic Text Disorder.