Random
Source Code
Random
Waking up covered in vomit after a night of alcoholic splendor
- Hey wheres jack at?
-I think he went to go put on his Irish Suitcoat!
- Aww man we just ate Taco Bell an hour ago!
When you take a shot down someone’s butthole while they simultaneously shit in your mouth.
“I needed to shit at the restaurant and my wife snuck a shot of whiskey into the family bathroom to Irish mudslide that turd”
When the IRA splashes you in the face with a bucketful of shit for overstaying your welcome.
"Right, stay 'er fer longer than anticipated and we give you the Irish Special.
When you are having oral sex being performed from a woman, then out of nowhere you squeeze green food coloring Down here throat and tell her something shocking that she gags while you say luck of the Irish.
Man Melvin is such a bitch, always giving me Irish nuts all the time, we can’t even have a normal conversation anymore.
Me to my girlfriend before we got busy for the first time: 'I have the Irish Plague'
Her in her charming New York accent: 'You asshole, I don't want to catch that'
Me: 'No, it means me prick is small'
Anyone who drinks beer North of Mexico or South of Canada.
This Irish-American is hammered, just like the rest of us.
Irish-American: Someone who is part Irish and part American or someone who has Irish ancestors but lives in America. Let me just point out that if you have a grandparent from Ireland and go around shouting that your “so proud of your Irish side and Guinness, and leprechauns”... you can fuck OFF. I have a great grandparent from Australia and you don’t see me shouting “IM AUSTRALIAN I HAVE A KOALA IN MY BACK GARDEN” if 1 of your parents are Irish then it’s pretty acceptable so say your Irish-American but just calm it down a bit. At least learn ACTUAL Irish culture and what it’s like here instead of going on a couple or Irish travel websites and suddenly you “know everything about Ireland because... IM IRISH”
“Irish-American”: “My grandmother is Irish so that means I'm one of you lol Ireland is great I love Guinness, and St Pattys Day”
Irish bie: “Do you want me to do your knees in or what?” “We don’t only drink Guinness, we aren’t leprechauns, we DON’T have lucky charms we have fucking cheerios and it’s St Patrick’s day or St Paddy’s day.”