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1. One who believes in "traditional values" but rejects any debate challenging the conservative definition of what said values are. Conservatives claim to value limited government, but are willing to expand government without limit in order to impose their personal morality on all others.
2. A liberal when it comes to the economy. Though individuals are barred from making various personal choices, businesses may do whatever they want with no repercussions.
3. One who is quite familiar with the concept of "Majority Rules" but is unable to understand the concept of "Minority Rights" (the premise that bars the majority from voting to restrict the rights of the minority).
4. An individual who claims to value the constitution above all else, but in reality is willing to suspend all amendments for any reason related to national security (except for the 2nd).
5. A black-and-white thinker. Conservatives think largely in absolutes, ignoring the various social, cultural, and economic nuances that define an issue.
1. Conservative view: Gay marriage is wrong because the Bible says so and I value the Bible as my personal guiding force. You, a male, may thus not marry your male partner.
2. Conservative view: Though same-sex couples are destroying America, oil speculators may drive up gas prices for their own personal profit; whatever that may do to the economy.
3. Conservative view: George W. Bush won 51% of the vote in 2004. Republicans now have a "mandate" to do whatever they want without considering the opinions of the remaining 49% of Americans.
4. Conservative view: You can be held indefinitely if deemed a potential terrorist without being charged or provided a lawyer, regardless of what the constitution says. A father may keep his loaded handgun within reach of his toddler because of what the constitution can be construed to say.
5. Conservative view: Our schools are underperforming. It must be the teachers. Pay them less.
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1) An ideology which espouses less government in theory, but has consistently failed in reality. Every "conservative" administration had grown government, and done more to restrict freedoms.
Conservatives blame various national problems such as health care, the economy, and what ever suits the moment on "illegals". This high degree of xenophobia implies a distrust, and dislike of non-white immigrants in reality.
The vast majority of conservatives are as described above, the few "minority" conservatives don't discount the xenophobia of this ideology.
Conservative: We need to keep the illegals out, they're ruining our country.
American: Which ones, the illegal Irish immigrants or the illegal Mexicans?
Conservative: Well uh, it's so easy to cross the Mexico border. Illegals, illegals!!
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Someone who didn't read the constitution
Amendment I
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion,- conservatives beleive that Religion, specifically christianity should be the guiding hand of government.
or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble- Connservatives are pro-police violence against protesters and often had liberal journalists killed during Vietnam, also they complain about the "Liberal Media" despicte watching nothing but the idiotic bile that oozes out of Rush Limbaugh's and Sean Hannidy's mouthes.
Amendment IV
The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized. -during both the Cold War and the Bush administration phones were tapped and personal records were seized warrantlessly by Conservative governments.
Amendment VI
In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the state- not only were gitmo inmates denied a speedy and public trial they were denied an trial by the Bush administration.
A conservative is someone who will look at this definition and mumbble " pot-smokin, flag burnin, baby eatin, Nigger lovin, america haters an then vote it down with his eleventh finger.
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One who dislikes change and therefore progress. If any country, especially the United States, was governed by conservatives from the start, we'd all either be Nazis, dead, or back in the Dark Ages. Often marked by ati-humanitarian, selfish causes such as triumphing businesses over people, promoting Christian prayer in every situation, keeping hate alive by promoting war, and keeping deserving people out of one's country. The conservative has troubles thinking for his/herself, and follows whatever he/she is told. Conservatives have statistically been noted to be the least educated members of a populace.
Bastard: "I'm a conservative"
Me: "Sorry. I'll try to speak slower"
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Someone who usually holds "Christian" values but says and does the most un-christian things. One who thinks that the poor are poor because they are lazy and that the rich earned their success. One who fails to adapt to the present day. The type of person who hates Mexicans with a fiery passion and thinks all brown-skinned Hispanics are Mexicans. They type of person who is against same-sex marriage because it's not "traditional marriage" and denies any arguement against it. One who simply denies any arguement and labels the other person as a "dirty liberal." One who is in adoration of the 9/11 heroes but denies them benefits for what they did. A person who usually labels themselves as "pro-life" but supports war and doesn't want health care that everyone can afford. Usually borderline racist or very racist.
Conservative Motto: Never explain, Never apologize.
Bob: Hey! You're a dirty liberal!
Jim: Dirty? Why?
Bob: Because you stand for everything America isn't!
Jim: Isn't it "American" to help other people and ask for rights?
Bob: Well, um...well...uhhhhhhhhhh....
Jim: It appears you have lost this arguem-
Bob: SHUT UP! YOU DIRTY, STINKING LIBERAL!
Jim: Cutting me off and name-calling....Well well, aren't you mature? I thought Conservatives were mature?
Bob: SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!
(Pouts and stomps feet on ground)
Jim: Okay, when you're mature enough to carry on a conversation without name calling or cutting me off, come talk to me again.
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People who tend to have black and white opinions on nearly every issue in the universe. Don't realize the importance of situational ethics. This is most likely the result of a fundamentalist religious upbringing.
A nine year old girl, tragically, is raped and impregnated by her stepfather. What to do? According to the religious absolutist, abortion is, under all circumstances, 100% wrong. Unless the birth is life-threatening, she can't abort.
Moderate: I don't normally support abortion, but here it's necessary.
Liberal: I think abortion is a right that belongs to the mother. I would support her right to choose if this girl was nine or twenty nine, raped or non-raped. (although i would personally disapprove of it in the latter).
Conservative: Fucking baby killers! It's an innocent fucking BABY we're talking about!
(as opposed to a non-sentient cluster of cells, lacking a nervous system and the ability to feel pain)
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1. One who belongs to a silent majority group who, historically, is not concerned with voting in feeble opinion polls and ridiculous online word-bashing contests (See Presidential Election 2004, when nearly every major news network published "national" polls of John Kerry gaining the majority of votes from coast to coast. Note how when push came to shove this silent majority swept the election with a mandate...
2. One that typically exists to the right of the political spectrum, but by no means is required to be "far" in such direction. A conservative also recognizes the fact that when a decidedly "far-right" President is elected by marginal popular vote, the MAJORITY has spoken that it would even side with the extreme of one side to flee from the flimsy and weak views of the opposition.
3. An entity that understands that America was founded that its citizens may exercise individual freedoms without *government intervention; this right not the be misinterpreted that those with views dissimilar to the majority may resrict the fair practice of those in the majority, just that they may choose to believe differently without persecution. Unfortunately liberalism has yet to grasp this fundamental concept and would rather chase Christians with lawsuits than read a history book.
Reread these 3 definitions also if you have lost sight of the definition of the word patriot.
Conservatism is often twisted, bashed, and contorted by misguided liberals who would rather point fingers and pat each other on the back than actually doing something constructive.
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