No me jodas

A phrase used to respond to a ridiculously untrue statement. Can also be used to reply to a laughable argument.

Literal: don't fuck with me/don't waste my time
Similar to: "bitch please" "whatever!"

Friend: But Ronaldo is better than Messi because he is more tan.
Me: Pero no me jodas!!!

no me jodas

literally: don't fuck me

more like:

don't fuck me about.

you having a joke?

Do all of exercise 5.

No me jodas!

JoDa Kis

A youtuber with currently 75 subs.

hey look, its JoDa Kis, that youtuber

que se joda

Fuck it

I’m gonna quit my job

Que se joda

Joda tu madre!

"Screw your mother!" en espaniol

Persona A: RAMERA!
Persona B: Joda tu madre!

No jodas

"are you serious?" in a positive way
do not mistake with "no me jodas" which means the same in a negative way or "don't fuck with me", "leave me alone"
(This exact definition is only applied for Spanish from Spain but it is also used maybe in other context in some other Hispanic countries)

+Nos ha tocado la lotería
-¡No jodas!

+Te han robado la bici
-¡No me jodas!

+Te cortaré el pelo mientras duermes
-Anda tío, no me jodas