I tell you what

Something Gary Whittaker says to either begin or end a conversation.

"I tell you what, that beagle is a power dog." - Gary Whittaker

"I tell you what, one time I ate 5 gallons of ice cream in one sitting" - Gary Whittaker

"I was at one time, the fastest man in Ohio...I tell you what, was the fastest white guy down at state." - Gary Whittaker

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tell you bout yourself

A country way to mean "tell someone off." Also can imply "fuck someone up."

Tee: Yo, you ugly as shit.
Nae-Nae: Meet me outside, bitch. Bet you I'll tell you bout yourself.

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I'll tell you what and such

Saying originating from Belmont County, OH. Used to begin a story or after something that promotes bragging rights in a rural or backwoods boondocks area. A similar saying is That's what's up.

Ex. I put a 3" lift kit and some 31's on my Chevy Tracker the other day, I'll tell you what and such.

Ex. I caught a catfish the other night. It was a big'un, I'll tell you what and such.

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I tell you what

By the use of this phrase to open or close a statement, the user acquires or asserts a pleasant, folksy authority. Sometimes paired with "boy" for added authority and folksiness (see example).

Frequent famous users include Cris Collinsworth and Hank Hill.

"Boy, that was a heck of a down field block by Michael Vick, I tell you what."

"I tell you what, the Seattle Seahawks came here to play tonight."

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i'll tell you the hell

a smart assed response used when someone has asked 'wat the hell?'. of course this is followed by wat is actually the hell.

i.e. Gabby walks in on her sister running about her room like a mad woman.

Gabby: Gwenn, wat the hell?!?!? you look like a retard!

Gwenn: the hell? you want the hell??? i'll tell you the hell. i just ate a bucket of sugar with a shovel!

Gabby: *sigh*

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I can tell you are doing it

I don't know what you are doing, but I can tell you are doing it wrong.

This is a humorous way to point out bad problem solving methods.

I don't know what you are doing, but I can tell you are doing it wrong!

let me tell you something

When you feel the need to make someone feel dumb by demonstrating your knowledge over a wide variety of subjects, this phrase is useful.

Me: That's not true
Moron: Yes it is.
Me: Let me tell you something... (infinite pause)
Moron: ... ?

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