Oh My Jesus

To be used when something is amazing/shocking to emphasise how you feel. It is not the same as Oh My God which would be a bigger deal, and really, doesn't sound as good. Can also be shortened to OMJ.

OH MY JESUS! I just saw Sally banging Paula's ex!

OH MY JESUS! I think we ran over a squirrel.

Oh My Jesus Fuck

Expression used when extremely shocked or suprised by something very unexpected

"That bikini bandit is about to shoot all the g-mart exectutives!"
"OH MY JESUS FUCK!!"

Oh lord jesus

When someone does something dumb out of no where.
When someone looks dumb.
When something happens unexpectedly.

Jocelyn: "hey, did you see ally's makeup today?"
Arlette: "no why?"
*arlette sees ally's horrifying make up*

Arlette: "oh lord Jesus"