pootine

A pootine is the excremental routine one follows. For instance, one may use the lavatory upon arriving home from work every day, or immediately after waking up.

People can become highly distressed and irritable if their pootine is interrupted, and may begin to experience stomach cramps and/or feel bloated.

"The boss made me work overtime last night and it nearly killed me. I mean, the guy totally screwed over my pootine!"

"Now that I'm taking these evening yoga classes I'm going to have to change my pootine, the last thing I want is to have an accident while attempting the cobra pose!"

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pootin mooning

When you fart while mooning someone.

I'm gonna do some Pootin Mooning

Scooter Pootin'

The act of shopping, running errands, or going around town to finish oddjobs.

Me and Mom are going scooter pootin', do you need anything?

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pootin' blanks

When you sit down on the can expecting to unload a large deuce but air farts are the only thing that comes out...similar to the phrase shooting blanks.

John: "Hey Dave, where are you?"
Dave: "On the can, about to take a huge slam!"
Dave's Butt: "phhhhht"
John: "Ha! You're just pootin' blanks!"

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can't toot for pootin'

Southern term meaning that one cannot accomplish the goal ahead because a similar goal is holding him or her back. "Can't win for losing."

Jim Bob: Hell I wanna start worshin' them 'maters but I keep findin' bugs in them corn I'm tryin' ta shuck!

Jeb: Boy you can't toot for pootin'!

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done some Pootin

Excreting in very large amounts while you gamble your car with a homeless person.

Anon: Yo! Tramp....

Tramp: You fucking stink

Anon: I will gamble my car with you?

Tramp:OK. Have you just done some Pootin?

Anon: Yes.. Yes i have

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Pootine

Pootine is a crap flavored protein bar. It could also refer to a protein related food that looks/smells/ tastes like crap.

Thai pootine sucks. It tastes like crap! I'll never listen to Burney again!