After a long night of drinking, a Slimy Selleck is the process of passing out on ones own toilet, and waking up with a neatly collected mustache made of pubes from the surrounding bathroom floor.
Man, I totally passed out last night baby faced, and woke up with a slimy Selleck.
Similar to the Dirty Sanchez, the Velvet Selleck is when you've had sex with a menstruating female, then smear the bloody head of your member under her nose, giving her a thick, impressive blood mustache.
Bonus points: If you plug it in her back door, and get a little poo on it, for a richer, velvetier texture.
Bro, I was tapping this chick on the rag, and thought she was lookin' undignified. So, I flipped her around, and gave her the Velvet Selleck.
A verb used to describe the comedic/defamatory drawing of a thick black moustache on the image of a clean shaven person.
Follows in the same tradition as Marcel Duchamp's L.H.O.O.Q.
'Some people call me a salesman. I call myself a "salesfront". So obviously I need strangers to trust me so I don't take kindly to it when someone Tom Sellecks my bus bench.'
- Modern Family Season 1 Episode 14 "Moon Landing"
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1) An actor famous for playing the TV character magnum P.I.
2) A sexual act named after said start. Specificially, to slap someone in the face with a semiflacid penis.
After she was done sucking my wang, I gave her a Tom Selleck right across the face..
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An mid 50's to 60's, mans hairy penis.
Man my sergeant's got his Tom Selleck out again.
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#1 Definition: The man/actor Tom Selleck.
#2 Definition: To conquer or defeat someone or cause injury to them or to their pride. (interchangeable with "wicked burn!")
#3 Definition: If a person is keeping it real or is Cool.
"I Tom Selleck'd my friend in the face"
"Oh snap, You just got Tom Selleck'd!!!"
"If only I was more Selleck about it, i would have had all three of them that night- at the same time"
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The act of shaving a mustache shape into your pubic hair. Not to be confused with a "SΓΌdlicher Adolf Hitler", or "Southern Adolf Hitler", which is the act of shaving all of your pubic hair, except of a small patch in the middle.
I needed to trim my junk up, so i got creative and gave myself a Southern Tom Selleck
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