Random
Source Code
Random
The point of ugliness in a male below which a 100% straight female would rather go against her sexual orientation and sleep with Ellen DeGegeneres than with him. The female equivalent is the Neil Threshold, for girls so ugly that a straight male would rather sleep with Neil Patrick Harris.
Alan is covered with zits, smells like a used pizza box, and has a hunchback-- I'd definitely rather do Ellen DeGeneres; he's below the Ellen Threshold.
40👍 9👎
the amount of times you are able to listen to the song "Iris" by The Goo Goo Dolls, without beginning to cry.
Try as he may, Jon could feel a lump in his throat as the song came to a close. His Iris Threshold was one.
Some things are just too practical to work. The practicality threshold is defined as the line beyond which things become too practical for use.
"Hey, why are we taking a hot air balloon to the moon instead of a rocket?"
"Because the rocket is past the practicality threshold!"
9👍 2👎
The amount of bullshit someone will put up with or tolerate before saying fuck it and walking away.
This guy Marc was whiney and kept losing his temper, so I said fuck it I'm out.
That's because you have a low bullshit threshold.
The point at which things become so inane or dramatic that you stop caring.
Bill: DON'T YOU EVEN CARE WHAT I'M SAYING TO YOU? THIS GAME IS MY LIFE!!!
John: No. I reached my apathetic threshold when you bitched about being killed for the sixteenth time.
Edwin: I reached my apathetic threshold when she broke up with me; as if I didn't see that one coming!
Scott: I do say, my good sir! -sips tea-
The few seconds you get to put cold butter on warm toast and have the toast accept that butter and melt it in. If you wait a moment longer the toast is not quite warm enough and you risk tearing the bread or having a butter mess on toast.
Let's discuss what I call "The Threshold of Toast" which is the few seconds you get to put cold butter on warm toast and have the toast accept that butter, while it softens it and soaks it up. That my friends is the Threshold of Toast. Enjoy some soon.
26👍 10👎
The level of friendship you deem necessary to exist between you and a friend to warrant posting on their wall when Facebook alerts you it is in fact their birthday.
Wife: Hey, honey, did you wish my cousin Jay a "Happy Birthday" on Facebook?
Husband: God no. Jay is like you're third cousin which makes him NOTHING to me. Not even sure how we are friends on Facebook. Never met the guy.
Wife: That's not important, you know Jay was there for me when my parents were going through that thing when were kids.
Husband: Sorry. Not happening. Jay is beneath the birthday threshold.
Wife: Fuck you.
Husband: Rules are rules.