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Dead man’s hand

When being blue balled by a girl, any man can utilize dead man’s hand. Wait for the girl to sleep and gently put her hand on your phallus whilst you fantasize about her jerking you off.

Chad: “So Brad, did you get lucky with Jessica last night?

Brad: “Nah dude, she blue balled me. I used the dead man’s hand though, so eventually she made me jizz.”

Chad: “Awesome”

by Anonymos Maximus July 12, 2021


Dead Man’s Hand Dutch Rudder

When someone (friend, stranger, homeless person, whoever) is either unconscious or deceased and you grab their hand, wrap their fingers around your erect penis and manipulate their elbow into moving their arm to jerk you off.

“Yo, my buddy was passed out in basically a diabetic coma, so before I called 911 I used him to give me a dead man’s hand Dutch rudder. I even finished right before the paramedics got there. I told them the jizz on his face was just frosting from all the Cinnabon and sodies he ate. They bought it!”

by The Gaudy Ginger February 10, 2021