engin

It is a fuckin name not engine its engin

Engin

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engineer

Someone who relates to the universe in a mathematical but socially inept way.

Optimist: "The glass is half full."
Pessimist: "The glass is half empty."
Engineer: "The glass is twice the size it needs to be."

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Engineer

Someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.

You: "Hey, wait here, I'mma go take a dump."

Friend: "Alright."

*5 minutes later*

Friend: "Dude..I was playing guitar with your amp and I noticed a parasitic capacitance between the output and the input, causing parasitic oscillation. So I really quickly soldered them a little further from eachother, so it shouldn't have any feedback anymore."

You: "Oh...uhhh... thanks?"

Friend: "Hey, I'm an engineer. It's what I do."

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engineer

A kick-ass uber-genius with godly math and science abilities, the training for wich being at the expence of those abilities for spelling and talking to members of the opposite sex.

"You know that you're an engineer if you can prove it mathematically"

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Engineering

n. A profession, usually taught in universities as a four-year program. It's far more rigorous than most other programs available to university students, with the benefit of near-guaranteed employment after graduation. Downsides include not being able to get laid and extreme social awkwardness.

Arts majors:

Look, isn't that one of those engineering students? Man, what a pathetic loser. We're so much cooler lolol.

Engineering student:

It's this "loser" here that'll be making 70 grand a year right after graduating. Enjoy your degree in Classical Literature suckers, it'll probably qualify you for flipping burgers.

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Engineer

One measures with a micrometer, marks with a crayon, and cuts with an axe.

The guy wearing the white shirt with the pocket protector leaning against the backhoe is an engineer. He could describe in great detail how that backhoe works but could not drive it to save his life.

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Engineering

n. A branch of university education. Usually taken by students who want a job after graduating.

I want to study engineering!

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