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a small hole of an island lying of Australia. Infested with sheep and other vermin.
New Zealand is a perfect sight for Atomic Weapons testing
1097👍 247👎
An insignificant group of islands in the South Pacific inhabited by 55 million sheep, 4.5 million of which think they are human.
American: "Are you British?"
New Zealander: "Nah mate, I'm from New Zealand."
American: *blank stare*
English bartender: "What's it to be guv?"
New Zealander: "A pint of lager thanks."
English bartender: "I see your cricketers beat us in the Ashes again."
2469👍 607👎
A place where you will find many sheep and no black people
tourist: where are the black people?
New Zealand: theres no such thing
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A place where absolutely nothing happens. The most boring place in the world. Great to live in if your 70, retired and want a life of serenity and sheep, but not if your a youth looking for excitement. Seriously don't come to New Zealand if you want to have fun!
Tourist: "I spend two weeks in New Zealand."
Friend: "Oh yeah? What'd you do there? Any crazy stories?"
Tourist: "Well the most exciting thing that happened was this one cow looked at me as I got close. The others didn't you see..."
Friend: "Dude...That is the lamest story ever"
627👍 146👎
A useless country which the natives (Maoris) believed they "fished up". Well known to get down and dirty with its sheep population.
New Zealand History (Maori POV): Aw bro, did ya know that we fished up da North Island? It was sweet as cuz...
580👍 137👎
New Zealand is roughly around 2220 KM's from the greatest country on earth..... Australia. Some people mistake the name New Zealand for "Australia Junior" but Australia is better in so many ways. For starters, the word bro isn't chucked around after every sentence, we don't have sheep constantly around us, we can pronounce words such as six, fish and chips and rich without saying "sux, fush and chups and ruch". In conclusion, Australians do it better
"Let's go to New Zealand for a holiday"
"Nah I don't feel like rooting sheep, lets go to Australia"
506👍 137👎
New Zealand
A land full of xenophobic, bad driving, stupid, one eyed, selfish, deluded, aussie hating twats.
The country is quite nice but none of the New Zealanders have any clue about it they all want to get out and go on ther OE. Once on their OE they rarely return because there is not work and any work there is will be better paid elsewhere.
'I live in a beautiful country full of friendly people here in New Zealand' !! yeah right it has the highest sucide rate of teenagers. A huge drug and alcohol problem. High chest problems because they live in wooden houses with poor heating. I rains constanly hence a green land under a long white cloud.
1880👍 556👎