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Tom-Tom-Longhammer is a slang term that denotes a man who is slightly cross-eyed, with pigeon feet and tall in stature (over 6ft 3in), yet, between his legs hangs an enormous penis, called a Longhammer. The prefix of this compound word originates from the idea that if said person was a Native American, his tribal name would be Tom-Tom. It is not unusual for a Tom-Tom-Longhammer to be exceptionally well endowed--often resembling a deformed cucumber whose nutrient source during gestational timeframes was a synthesized form of growth hormone that is currently banned in most countries except North Korea where it is used for artificial excess growth in vegetable production. This uniquely sized penis is also used a counter weight that swings to and fro, like a pendulum, neutralizing the opposing motion created by the large anatomically incorrect pigeon feet. It has been said that a Tom-Tom-Longhammer is the most loyal person you will ever meet. He is generous and kind, albeit awkward in nearly all social settings due to his enormous wanker. When a Tom-Tom-Longhammer gets angry, he immediately and instinctively takes off all of his cloths and begins to violently masturbate while going completely crosseyed. It is best to maintain a safe distance from a Tom-Tom-Longhammer when he feels threatened.
Damn, bro, look at that big pigeon looking motherfucker, I bet that homie is a fucking Tom-Tom-Longhammer!
the act of assembling a team of african american transvestites and attaching each of their wee wee's to a beer bong then collecting the multi colored urine and leaving it to ferment, 39 years later you will have a nice wax candle to feed your grandchildren
fuck those swinging tom tom's
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tomorrow - useful for when you are emailing or texting to avoid having to write out the whole word
text: wot r u up 2 tom tom?, email: I'll see you 8pm tom tom at the Salon Bar.
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The ultimate fighter pilot. Known worldwide as the coolest, best looking manipulator of aircraft controls. Admired and feared by all.
Man, that guys's a fucking stud... he's such a Tom Tom.
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A clique of losers and other assorted outcasts, like that emo kid Dan that sits two desks up from you in math and you always wanted to say hey Dan I forgot to shave this morning, can I borrow a razor but you don't have the balls. Or that Goth kid. You know the one. Nerds or any other form of dork are not considered Tom Tom Club members.
I use to hang out by the ampitheatre but this Tom Tom Club started hanging out there, so now I hang out by the quad.
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When your GPS sends you to a place that is nowhere near where you intended to go.
Where the hell are we? This is a cul-de-sac, not the Flying J! Damnit Tom-Tom!
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