Two pump surprise

Ejaculating after 2 thrusts surprising yourself and/or your partner

We did have sex but i gave her the two pump surprise

Two Pump Champ

Finishing quickly, considered a great accomplishment, and source of pride. It takes one with tremendous skill to be hailed under such a title.

Two Pump Champs, having mastered the art of sex, explore many other areas of life with their extra free time. This often includes World of Warcraft, and Magic the Gathering.

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two pump chump

A male who prematurely ejaculates

"Dave M, is such a two pump chump. that he blows his load before he even see the gold,"

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Two-Pump Chump

1) when having sex and you only get it in twice before you done!!!!//// Two-Pump!!!!

haaa!!! Alex Nelson is a Two-Pump Chump

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two pump conversion

An event whereas after you finally get a chick to let you score with her, you start the lovemaking process and finish after an amazing two pumps...

I finally got my new girl alone and naked and all I could pull off was a two pump conversion.

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The Two Pump Rule

The Two Pump Rule has been created in honor of all those christians who feel guilty about having sex even if the guy just put his penis in once and then they felt bad and stopped. Do not worry my fellow christians, you did not have sex because a penis must be inserted into the vagina two times to have had sex. The head of the penis must totally be inside to count as a pump. If she is a virgin and you give only two pumps but break the hymen then well done, you have pooped her cherry without having sex with her.

Example 1:
Sally: I'm pregnant with your baby
John: Bitch, no your not
Sally: Your the only one I have has sex with
John: We didn't have sex, we didn't have sex because I got mines within two pumps
Sally: What?
John: Yeah bitch, "The Two Pump Rule", now get the fuck out my house cause I'm not the father.

Example 2:
Jack: Did you fuck my Wife!!!!!!
Matt: No
Matt: (thinking to himself)- I did not fuck her because I jacked off in the bathroom until I was almost about to cum and then went onto the bed and put it in her and ejaculated on the second pump...therefore I did not fuck her....thanks to The Two Pump Rule

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Two Pump Trump

Someone who comes in strong politically and finishes weak.

We know he's eager to get in but hope it's more satisfying than a Two Pump Trump.

- Moped Dave

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