Apple computer

A type of computer that many troglodytes think is the best around

troglodyte: the MacBook (apple computer) is best
Normal person: no it's not

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computer science

"CS"

The magical major where you have to write a program the night before it is due while your friends are playing poker and getting laid.

Forces you to take 3 semesters of calculus. This is not good.

I did fine in CS, but I failed calculus and lost my scholarship.

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computer crash

when your computers hard drive is holding so much porn that it just simply quits.

bob:why doesnt your computer work?

jon:i was watching porn and it just stopped working

bob:sounds like a computer crash!

computer high

What happens after you've been on the computer so long that your eyes glaze over and you start acting like your high, stoned and/or drunk.

Computer Girl: Wooooo I've been on the computer for SIX HOURS STRAIGHT! Wheee! I'm gonna go now, biznatches. Gonna go to...where's that place again? That place...
Guy Watching: Wow, someone's computer high.

computer science

Computer major for
1) Hardcore computer people who want power Power POWER!
2) Masochistic individual who enjoys punishing himself
3) One who wants to become a programmer

Don't confuse a CS msjor for one who majors in Information Systems, or "Lazy Man's CS". Information Systems is more similar to majoring in Word.

LA LA LA LA LA, I'm in computer science, I want to be a programmer, yeah, that's it school, rape my ass! Bastards.

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Porn Computer

a personal computer, either in the form of a laptop or desktop, usually infected with other viruses, for example cyber herpes, and/or is lacking in memory or in need of major repairs, that has been dedicated for the consumption and/or viewing of porn.

"Don't ever say I didn't buy you anything," said Joey, "I gave you a porn computer for your personal entertainment needs."

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Computer AIDS

A lethal virus contracted on one's computer due to excessive observation of pornography. Generally non-curable.

Tyrone: Yo, I gots mad computer AIDS 'cause I be watchin' like nine consecutive hours of porn yesterday.
Louis: Yo, shit.
Tyrone: Word.

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