would you like a spoon

said to someone for purposes of randomosity. Would you like a spoon is a completely random comment used to confuse people to death.

Me:alrite mate
someone: Alrite, how ya doin?
Me: Im alrite thanks, would you like a spoon?
Someone: Blarg i am dead

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I would, but I'm pregnant

an excuse for doing nothing, used by women as a reason for not doing things that anyone else can do without a second thought

make the beds? i would, but I'm pregnant..

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What would Link do?

Similar to what would Jesus do but with some different outcomes

*Being taunted by gang of potential enemies
Friend "what would Link do?"
Yourself "you're right, lets leave it, they're ruining themselves"

*Someone else being ganged up on by enemies
Friend "What would Link do?"
Yourself "...probably fuck them up! Lets do it!"

Would do you nicely

A fragment that acts like an adjective, but is usually attached to front of a statement or new sentence. Used to describe a noun.

That coat is warm. Would do you nicely today in the wind.

Would you hit me

She is trying to say would you fuck me

If i where near you would you hit me

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I would turn you in

I would report you to the police.

If you kill someone, I would turn you in !

i would tax you

I would fuck you.

Damn cutie I would tax you!