When someone with braces is masterbating and their climax is so good they accidentally locked their jaw.
John Braced For Impact and had to go to the dentist the next morning.
The position assumed by passengers of an aircraft in danger of an imminent collision or emergency landing as announced over the cabin’s public announcement system - occasionally adopted during a particularly disquieting visit to the toilet to dispatch a no.2 when someone is required to bow their head and grip something nearby or put one or both hands up against the wall.
Oh man, that curry really carved my guts up, last night. I had to assume the brace position just now.
To taste one’s braces means to make out with someone who has braces, pretty self explanatory.
Person 1: Hey person 3, person 2 wants to taste your braces!
Person 2: oh shut the fuck up, person 1.
Person 3: I’m down
Person 2: oh okay then
(This actually happened with a group of friends irl but spoilers, no making out actually happened)
A concoction of rubber, metal, and souls of the damned that the dentist say "make your teeth straight," but all it does it show you what hell on earth is. As the wires constantly poke at the inside of your poor, poor mouth, and you'd wish you could unhinge your jaw like a snake, and eat in one bite, because when you're hungry, you have to push through the pain and agony of trying to chew your food. It also disables you to speak like a civilised normal human being, and disables you from not having people play chess on your checkerboard looking teeth. It's a Costco sample of hell on earth. They fool the poor, young souls who fall into the trap of Hitler's checkerboard into being happy by letting them choose a color. They lie to you and say you look cute, handsome, and more mature with the braces to make you wanna keep using them, and deceiving your poor soul. If you've never had braces, you're playing life on easy mode.
OW! THE WIRE'S POKING ME! I WISH I NEVER GOT BRACES!
OW! I CAN'T EVEN CHEW, WHEN WILL THIS HELL END!?!?
Brakets and wires in your mouth that will permently get you the nickname "braceface" which is not a complement
Hey you with the BRACES comehere *doesnt respond* come here braceface gets a permanent nickname
A form of torture.
Orthodontists (AKA psychopaths that you really can never trust) will let you choose your colors. You will think this is alright until you realize that those colored rubber bands will stop you from eating anything you like for the next week because it hurts so much. Pain medicine doesn’t help. That wax stuff they give you doesn’t help either. That week will seem like the longest week ever. The brackets will tear at your skin, and if the back ones break off, you will have to call the orthodontist and have the stupid wire poke your cheek until you can come back in. No matter how attractive you are you will never be able to pull because those braces are also like a machine that makes you extremely ugly. EVERY SINGLE RELATIVE WILL ASK YOU TO SMILE FOR THEM AND THEN NOT GET OVER IT FOR A WHOLE YEAR. GOD CAN WE TALK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE?
Finally, you will come in one day and the orthodontist will say, “You’re almost there!”
The truth is, you’re not. For 5 or more months you will have to deal with this and they will finally take it off. FINALLY!
“Now just wear this retainer all day and all night”
“What?”
“Just wear this retainer all day and all night”
“For how long?”
“A year”
“Kill yourself”