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Phrase used to describe an impossible task
"Mate trying to beat traffic on Thanksgiving weekend is like beating the devil at chess"
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A woman who complain about dead beat dude, but she have no skill set herself. She would probably be homeless if she did not have family, friends, or some type of fuck buddy type relationship.
Susan told Tummy she would not go out with him because he works for UPS, but she does not have a job, never went to college, and live with her ex boyfriend Johnny. She still sick his dick even though Johnny goes out with Jennifer. She is a dead beat bitch.
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An ass beating so bad the recipient actually learns something.
Boy I'm gonna give you an educational ass beating!
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1. To talk about something without mentioning it directly or avoid getting to the core of the subject--to try to bring up a subject in a roundabout way. Often motivated from a desire not to speak frankly about the subject, either because the subject is taboo, it's impolite to bring it up directly, or the conversation is perceived likely to be painful.
Well, Joe, I heard you were thinking about selling your car...
"Chris Capel"'s definition
2. To either jerk off with your dick a few inches from a vagina OR
when you're about to cum, pull it out of the vag and jerk it to finish off and cum on her pubes.
Well, Joe, I heard you were thinking about selling your car...
instead of
So, Joe, how much did you want for that Explorer of yours?
Also,
Susy, what are your plans for the future?
instead of
Susy, will you marry me? -- "Chris Capel"
"Theoretically I don't wanna beat around the bush" Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo - Bloodhound Gang
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The process of a Prison Guard beating the crap out of an inmate on Christmas Day
Yo Fiddy, didga see dat seasons beatings the skell on Cell Block C took from the honky hack?
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Like a sore dick
Person 1: Wow that's a great deal on that broccoli.
Accomplice: Yep, like a sore dick.
Person 1: What??
Accomplice: You can't beat it.
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A loosly coined phrase in an attempt to cast all blame on the divorce, kids problems, ex white trash...I mean wifes problems, etc. Of course the ex never had anything to do with any of the marriage problems. Was put through school by the "dead beat dad" and forgot what she ate or wiped her ass with while she was doing it. The phrase is used in place of "your dad" or "your father" when addressing the children. This is an attempt to cast away all blame on "Mom of the year" and cast all misfortune on "The dead beat dad". Using laws written in the 1920's and 1930's, perfect moms are able to go to court, get a sizable portion of "dead beat dads" paycheck, give him the honor of being able to see his kids every other weekend, or at the last minute when mama's "going out", then re-enforce to the kids with cute little comments like, "Too bad your dad wont spend more time with you", or "I know, I know. Your dad never has any money". This along with many other factors leaves the child with the impression that almighty mom is perfect and dead beat dad, is just that, a dead beat. I mean really, how hard is it to program a 3 year old when you have them 90% of the time and 15 years to work on them. As time progresses, mom of the year usually ends up being 45 years old, looking like hammered dog shit, 6 kids from 3 different dads (all of course are dead beats). She is drunk by 10am on scotch, but thats ok because she has a nice business that she should really incorporate, because all the checks comming in between child support and alimony is a pain in the ass to keep track of. Of course all her problems are associated with the ex's, kids are hooked on drugs, daily gang bangs, and drink like fishes, but hey, they learned from the best huh?! As her tax writeoffs...I mean income producers...I mean kids get older, this is all they know, so the cycle repeats itself. Of course its all the dead beat dads fault, because the "sorry bastard" never spent time with his kids, and if he wanted to see them more he should have fought in court for the right!
Kid#1 Hey pal, why dont you ever talk about your dad?
Kid#2 My mom says he's a dead beat dad and he only wants to see me every now and then.
Kid#1 It must be right if your mom says so huh?
Kid#2 Yea, must be. He never has any money and lives in a shitty apartment anyway.
Kid#1 Doesnt he drive like 3 hours to get you though?
Kid#2 Yea
Kid#1 Man, I wish my dad would spend 10 minutes with me. By the way, You sure have a lot of cool shit. iPod, PS3, clothes, skateboard, cell phone, and scooter.
Kid#2 Yea, my mom is so cool huh?
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