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Mall-Tard

An angst-ridden, unhappy child, anywhere from the age of 13-19, who's only dream that he/she hasn't given up on is to venture to the mall whenever he/she is not in school (and as long as mommy's giving him/her a ride) and collaborate with other Mall-Tards like him/herself.

80% of Mall-Tards specifically are overweight, 15 year-old scene girls, who tend to insult any unsuspecting passerby under their breath, without mercy or remorse. Beware the Mall-Tard when in groups. Very much like the nimble wolf, they have power in numbers. Groups of Mall-Tards may even muster up enough backbone to say something unkind to you within the range of decibels that the human ear can pick up!

Not unlike the wolf, the Mall-Tard is rarely seen outside of its pack- although they have been known to split from their main company into smaller platoons in order to cover more area. This can be useful when said Mall-Tards want to have their presence known in the food court, but can't sacrifice the search for the extra-small Bullet for My Valentine shirts in Hot Topic.

Mall-Tards have a never-ending hatred for all that walks on two legs- and beyond. Many theorize that this hatred is manifested from the smoldering remains of their haunted and traumatic pasts, but many experts in the field also argue that they are only pussies and ass-eaters with no knowledge of the world or its people, and have plenty of their parents money to blow.

EX:1
Dude 1: Dude, let's just go into Teavana- I can see a gaggle of Mall-Tards coming straight for us!
Dude 2: But they always try to sell you shit in there...
Dude 1: THERE'S NO FUCKING TIME LET'S GO!!!

EX:2

Mall-Tard girl: Hey!! You want my phone number sexxxy?!!
Dude: No- what are you like 10?
Mall-Tard Girl: FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING FAGGOT ASS CUNTLICKING RETARDFAG I HOPE YOUR BOYFRIEND DIES!!!1!
Dude's friend: Dude you just got Mall-Tarded!

EX:3

Mall-Tard 1: I hate waiting outside of Vitamin World! I wanna die! Look at all of these fags trying to buy their faggot ass fag pills.

Man walking into Vitamin World: *Stops and stares*
(Mall-Tard 1 Immediately turns around and hides amongst his fellow Mall-Tards; Man walks away)
Mall-Tard 2: Don't worry, that guy was a fag

by dojo24 November 18, 2010


Mall Pussy

When you really want to Beat It Up but you're a teenager and have no car so you have your dad take you to the mall so you can beat up that mall pussy.

Hey dad, can you please give me a ride to the mall? There's some mall pussy I'd like to beat up.

by DipTheBallsIn May 3, 2020


Coconut Malled

Verb: Coconut Malled
The act of getting pranked by getting sent a video

Paul got Coconut Malled today by his friend Bartholomew via text.

by bl00dycl0wngutz June 7, 2021


Coconut mall

If you get coconut malled you getting owned by someone

NATHAN JUST GOT COCONUT MALLED

by Isayestothis February 8, 2021

11๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Mall Rats

People who have no lives so they spend all day and every day at the mall creeping on people.

We want to be Mall Rats today.

Fag1: Dude, I am feeling in a creepy mood, I think I am going to act like a Mall Rat today.

Fag 2: Good idea! I am feeling creepy too!

by Water Chestnut December 28, 2011

11๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Palisades Mall

Stores fail at staying open for more than one year, loud, dangerous past midnight, old people in the morning, annoying solicitors trying to sell crap, mall security thinks they're the Clarkstown Police.

and many childhood memories for anybody who grows up in Rockland.

Example should include the word "Palisades Mall"

by Don't use ur real name loleee May 3, 2009

27๐Ÿ‘ 8๐Ÿ‘Ž


mall goth

An individual calling themself "goth"/"gothic" that ,in actuality, is not involved in the subculture.
They listen to overhyped nu-metal/emo bands that they like for the simple fact that they believe it will make them 'cool',or more 'gothic'.
Usually between the ages of 12-17, they have a very blatant fashion sense; commonly wearing baggy, black pants with chains draped from them, spiked wristbands/collars, beanies, and especially Slipknot, HIM, or Korn tees.
Their chief source of fashion is Hot Topic (owned by Abercrombie & Fitch)
Some will don a depressed visage, never smile or speak, and others will don a moody, angry tone.
None of these 'goths' are generally 'gothic' at all. None of these people understand the origins, roots, or influences of the subculture, nor would they likely to be interested in any of its true aspects.

"You're indefinitely not involved in the gothic subculture; you would appear to be a mall goth."
"My friend only listens to HIM and Slipknot, and pretends to be depressed all the time; he's a mall goth."

by Draconysius April 25, 2006

255๐Ÿ‘ 114๐Ÿ‘Ž