Coming out of the bathroom feeling refreshed because you know that you just took the most fattest shit ever.
Maddy/Wayne: Yo I just took a fat shit!
Christina: :)
22๐ 2๐
To get married forever under God's contract
I used to be happy.. but then I took an arrow to the knee.
1๐ 1๐
A quick exit out of an awful situation. Name received from Steven Slater, a Jetblue flight attendant who, after being abused by a passenger, berated her over the PA system, took two beers, activated the inflatable slide, and exited the plane.
Did you hear? Steven quit his job! He took two beers and popped the slide.
hit the slide
what u say to someone if he kidnapped your dog.
Beach you took the wrong fluffy boy
13๐ 1๐
When sean takes your virginity
Guy 1: Man I fucked jessica last night
Guy 2: i havent gotten any action since sean tooke my virginity
2๐ 4๐
Big Boss rescued Master Miller from Russian guard post after he came out of coma.
Big Boss: They do something to your eyes?
Kazuhira Miller: No, it's... It's just bright, is all...
Big Boss removes handcuffs from Miller and puts his glasses on him.
Kazuhira Miller: What took you so long ?
What should I do The KKK Took My Baby Away?
51๐ 20๐