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Other than the name of the Tom Waits song a chocolate Jesus is the sexual act of shitting in someones mouth and they die of e. coli poisoning and you hope they come back three days later.
I tried the Chocolate Jesus on Carol the other day and I went to the tomb and the stone was still there. I guess she isn't a Choclate Jesus.
9👍 14👎
A god among us he controls your sorrows and hell. He lives in California looks stoned all the time and plays zelda.
Emo Jesus interfered and our relationship is over, now I feel like becoming emo!
9👍 13👎
The act of being so high off of marijuana that you actually believe you can walk on water and shit like that.
Guy 1: duuuuuude...
Guy 2: Shit man, you are JESUS high!
11👍 17👎
A hulking vehicle who often hits those who are in need of something drastic in their lives. Often that change is paralysis or death. You probably know somebody who was hit by one.
That fucker got hit by the Jesus Bus REAL good.
11👍 17👎
Alexander Ovechkin the greatest goal scorer in hockey. He'd walk on water but it always turns to ice.
Cory- Hey did you see Hockey Jesus last night?
Dave- 5 goals and 4 assists.
Kiel- I wish the Pens had 2 Malkins and 3 Crosbys so we could trade for Hockey Jesus.
Cory- Kiel why don't you run a dodil up your ass.
30👍 60👎
Somebody who plays Call of Duty at an otherwordly level.
13👍 22👎
Undeniable sexual god(ess). This person is BTF. This person redefines sex. having sex with this person is like having an orgy with ten or more of the hottest most sexually appealing and able persons you have yet to imagine while tripping hard on ecstacy. You don't know till you've done it. this is what has been missing in your life.
Alexis is a sex jesus. i must marry this girl.
5👍 6👎