Random
Source Code
Random
To get out of everything when you are a foreigner
Police: "sir, you were going 100 mph in a 20 mph zone. I need you to take you to custody"
Me: " you know english is my second language, right?"
Police: "oh you are fine then. Have a good day!"
Person 1: "Dude! Why didnt you invite me to the party you threw? I thought I was one of your closer friends!!"
Person 2: "Dude! you know english is my second language, right?"
Person 1: "Oh nevermind then! we are cool!"
1👍 3👎
An alternate form of sayin that you (Or someone else) is joking.
Buddy 1 : I got so drunk last night, I took that broads v-card!
Buddy 2 : Your kidding me, you took her down?!
Buddy 1 : No, but you could imagine what it would be like though, right?
Buddy 2 : Oh you sly dog!
3👍 3👎
man drives right off a fucking bridge
Man: Sometimes it's hard to resist the urge to drive right off a fucking bridge HHHhahaha oh look there's one
HUUUUhddJSUGYDSDKUHDHGUDBUJWYDYJLAKSJLKDLJSHIDHKNEKBDIFHLSNDBKS
9👍 1👎
the most Minnesotan thing one could ever say.
often accompanied by a thick Minnesota accent
person 1: *blocking door*
person 2 (needing to get to the hotdish): “ope lemme just sneak right past ya here”
13👍 52👎
When you see your boyfriend come back from a 2-year space mission with his mom and a weird space dog and he looks like he's chiseled by the gods.
"Does he look bigger to you guys? He's bigger, right? Keith's bigger?"
4👍 2👎
during half life 2 G man said this
The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world - G man
3👍 2👎
Wassa baby take me out to dinner
Person 1: what do you have to say to Joe Biden right now.
Person 2: wassa baby take me out to dinner.
Person 1: ayo
3👍 4👎