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A saying by non-native English speakers who have literally no idea how our metaphors or idioms work. Bullshit nonsense that's probably the butt of a joke or something.
Person 1: Hey Sven, why weren't you at work yesterday?
Sven: That's the way the apple falls when the cookie doesn't crumble far from the tree.
Person 1: ...
an old-school fighting move derived from a mixture of Korean and Japanese kung fu, where the attacker graps his opponets scrotum turns a 180 an backfists his opponet in the stomach then the face while never letting go of his scrotum
Josh: did u hear what happened to Joe last night?
Rev:Yeah i was the one who pulled off Monkey steal pear from tree
Josh:O ok i'm gonna leave now
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Assuming you will have something before you actually have it; similar to "counting your chickens before they hatch" (which is commonly attributed to Aesop).
"The Mariners could do better than expected this year."
"Let's not kid ourselves. Check your premises before you make a prediction."
"I'm assuming a number of things go right. Maybe I'm just counting my monkeys before they're out of the trees."
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an expression indicating optimism regarding ones current situation
You: So what's the word with that rash of yours?
Me: Dude, my palm tree be throwing up new leaves! Doc, says it'll clear up just fine.
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The most amazing chick you'll ever meet! Yeah. You know, the one, who who think would never hang with you cause she is so amazing, but she will! Yeah, that one. She seems like she'd be a bitch. But she ain't!
Yo! I thought Treese was biotch, but she ain't!
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Treese is close relative of the well known animal Hippopotamus.
Girl 1: Look it's a Hippopotamus!
Girl 2: No that's a Treese but they are closely related.
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A sex phrase that involves masturbation or sex with a woman.
it means you stroke your dick until all the semen shoots out.
12 year old: I cannot cum, but why?
Sex obsessed person: Well, you gotta shake the tree until they all cum out.
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