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Motherfuckers Against Drunk Drivers

Sadly it's what the organization called mothers against drunk drivers eventually became.

They had a good cause, one that even the people who drink agreed with. Once they got power they became drunk with power. They were not happy with getting the new laws passed. They keep pushing for even more and stricter laws.

Politicians were more than happy top oblige. They saw the whole affair as a means to raise money without raising taxes.

The old way of handling drunk drivers needed changed. Too many decent people were killed. Unfortunately now decent people have arrest records for drinking half a beer.

Politician to police chief. We need a new city hall but we are short of funds. Go arrest more drunk drivers.

police chief; We are already busting a lot of people as it is. I thought we were doing this to stop drunk drivers. If that's not the case then you ought to convince the people to raise taxes to build your new city hall.

The politician goes to a Motherfuckers Against Drunk Drivers meeting. He says " Drunk Driving is a CRIME against humanity!" "I need your help." "The police chief is RESISTING my efforts to rid the streets of this scum!" "I need all of you to do a public demonstration at the mayors office and DEMAND he be fired!"

There was a huge protest at the mayors office. The police chief was fired, the new police chief cracked down on the drunk drivers. A huge new city hall building was built. All the politicians became rich from illegal kickbacks. The police chief took a job as a meter maid in a smaller town that paid very low salaries. The drunks were still driving and killing people.

by OneWhoKnowsBetter December 25, 2012

12๐Ÿ‘ 5๐Ÿ‘Ž


Drunk text tourettes syndrome

When you have zero control over the text messages that you are sending. And you continue to text with no response stating all kinds of ridiculous things to the person. Do to your inebriated state. And typically in the morning you have zero recollection of saying the things you did.

"Hi! I'm an astronaut". " You tool you are not responding to me" " You want to have intercourse.??" Still no response"??? "I hate you". "I love you". Next morning... Hi!! I appologize I have drunk text tourettes syndrome and I have zero control over what i say or do.

by oh!hi!girl January 18, 2012

18๐Ÿ‘ 10๐Ÿ‘Ž


Drunk in charge of social software

To be Drunk in charge Of Social Software; to think that it is a good idea to text,email,IM,blog your mates late at night after a surprise drinking session when it probably isn't.

Still I need a button on my mobile phone which says:

'Caution: Drunk in charge of social software. Do you really want to send that text?.. It's 01:30 am and you have just left a pub after a five hour surprise drink up on an empty tummy, are very over-excited and your friend may think you're a bit weird (again)..'

by Ed Mitchell April 11, 2007

6๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Ur drunk go home

Alternative variation: Ur drunk go to bed

Phrase used when someone who is more often than not, not actually under the influence of alcohol, but who's interjection into a conversation is unwelcomed and irrelevant.

Bob: Hey Bob how is Alice's doing? Sorry does she prefer Alice or Allison?

The other guy whose name also happens to be Bob: Either is fine she's easy like that. Yeah she's doing good thanks for asking. Yeah. Well, actually she's not great to be honest, I don't know why I felt I couldn't tell you. The chemo doesn't seem to be working. I'm not sure...well...I mean..we're looking into different-

Russell: What about my wife? I'm not even married dude.

Both Bobs: Ur drunk go home Russell.

by Jim Bond December 18, 2022


Letโ€™s get drunk first

What you do when you donโ€™t smoke weed and want to do sumthing with some sort of intoxication.

Phil, yo letโ€™s go grocery shopping we all out of food.
Mark, yeah letโ€™s get drunk first.
Phil, bett

by Guacdawg February 3, 2023


Dude, your text is drunk.

A cellphone text that's been sent by someone you think is drunk because it's incomprehensible, but you're not sure and you don't want to offend them by asking if THEY'RE drunk.

Person A: "Yeah were somewhere gone off now. where u at?"

Person B: "Dude, your text is drunk. Call me."

by Gin Blossom June 19, 2010


Bicoastal Drunk Texting (BDT)

Bicoastal Drunk Texting (BDT) most commonly occurs with friends living on opposite ends of the country, separated by several time zones. Someone on the East Coast will start drinking at normal hours and then start drunk texting or sexting their friends. What they don't consider is that their West Coast counterparts are three hours behind, so they start receiving these drunk texts and sexts in the late afternoon/early evening.

Bicoastal Drunk Texting (BDT)

Messages 9pm ET:
"I want you right now baby!"
"I'm so wasted! Ahhhh I want you NOW!"
"Sorry...drunkkkk"

Recipient at 6PM PT:
"Wow...she's wasted and I haven't even eaten dinner yet."
"The future looks bright. I want to be you in 3 hours!"
"I love it when you BDT me baby."

Bicoastal Drunk Texting (BDT)

by Daniel Boooone May 25, 2011

11๐Ÿ‘ 6๐Ÿ‘Ž