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What you say when someone needs to chill out! Calm your tots!
She needs to calm your tots!!
Pet birds are loud, obnoxious animals that never shut the fuck up and that seriously harsh the vibe of any social gathering with their screeching orations. You'd be pissed too if you knew how to fly but were stuck in a cage.
Calm your bird means stop freaking out like a caged bird and harshing the vibe. Either shut the fuck up, or go be free elsewhere.
Joe: "MAN DO YOU SEE THAT GUY? I THINK HE LOOKED AT ME MAN. I THINK HE WANTS TO SAY SOMETHING. I'M GONNA GIVE IT TO HIM. I'M GONNA PUT MY FIST RIGHT UP HIS ASS!"
Cool Pete: "Joe. JOE. You're high on acid and cocaine and you saw yourself in the mirror. Calm your bird."
A hermit crab version of calm yo tits
Used by protective parents. Some kids never grow out of it.
Person1: I hate you!
Person2: Whoa! Calm yo grits.
Person1: Wth does that mean!?
Person2: Calm down, my mom said it was a common saying...
an expression basically saying to "calm down" but in a more jokingly insulting manner, including the phrase "your mom". If someone says something really dramatically, that you can say "your mom" to, you can basically say "calm your mom".
Girl: "OMG that spider is UGLY."
Me: "Dude, CALM YOUR MOM."
Nicest way to tell your gf/bf to shut the FUCK up.
Derrick always tells Esther to calm your spirit when she won't leave things alone. Wes
Something you say when your girl is getting a little too excited/anxious/nervous/etc.
Variation of "Smooth your boobs" "give your chest a rest" "adjust your bust before you combust" "hakuna yo tatas".
Mindy: I can't believe you were flirting with Cindy! We're DATING Tom! Where is your LOYALTY?! How am I supposed to raise our unborn child?!
Tom: Wait... We have a child?
Mindy: That's besides the point. WHY WERE YOU LEADING HER TOWARDS THE BEDROOM?! IN MY OWN HOUSE?! HAVE YOU NO SHAME?!
Tom: Calm your tits, Mindy, Cindy's my cousin. Besides, you've banged Cindy, Sandy, Quinn, and Nate before.
Mindy: *walks away muttering* Well, so have you...
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the "calm down" of horniness.
can be applicable to ladies aswell.
guy: oh man i want you so bad
girl: woah woah there, calm your sack these legs ain't open for no one except my boyfriend!
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