Jesus H. Christ

the name of te guy who made me emo and gave me the gay.

A: Do you know what the 'H.' is Jesus H. Christ means?

A: That's right. It stands for hottie. Jesus Hottie Christ

The following evening, A was beaten up

Jesus H. Christ

An exclamatory statement made to show intense emotion. The "H" stands for Helen, which is Jesus' middle name.

"I just wanna lather myself up with heavy whipping cream and roll around the kitchen"
"Jesus H. Christ, please stop talking right now. Also, the H in that sentence stood for Helen."
"Okay.

Jesus fucking christ

A statement of pure, raw, and utter disbelief. Usually used when you see something absolutely fucking cursed and you can't think of anything asides from "Jesus Fucking Christ."

"So, bro. Did you hear about the whole accident where that kid blew up an entire fucking supermarket?"

"..."

"Bro, you okay?"

"Jesus Fucking Christ.

Jesus F Christ

Spoken by a troubled soul, a person fluent in most heanus of sware words though due to a religous tendancy struggles to link 'Fuck' or 'Fucking' to his/her lord above blaspheme's..

Stjohn - "Margaret, why u aint cleaned my car bitch?"

Margaret "Jesus F Christ SJ, that cunting Landrover gets so dirty up our motherfucking mile long drive, do it ur fucking self"

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Jesus Hank Christ

For years people have used the expression "Jesus H Christ" without knowing what the H stands for. The H stands for Hank.

"Jesus Hank Christ! Nick wont stop peeping."

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Christ Jesus

An expression used to denote utter surprise, horror and confusion; used in "Return of the Living Dead" when two paramedics encounter a horde of ravenous undead zombies on the hunt for brains.

Can also be used to denote complete disgust with a person or situation.

"Do you hear that?"

(looks down the road at undead hordes of brain eating zombies)

"Christ Jesus!"

or....

Man1 : "Did you flush the toilet after you dropped that monster dook?"

Man2: "Nope."

Man1: "Christ Jesus. You are disgusting."

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Jesus H. Christ

A satirical phrase of surprise or angst used instead of Jesus Christ.

Person 1: Jesus H. Christ!

Person 2: ...what does the H stand for?

Person 1: Hussein!

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