You are a licenced or professional major in eating someone's ass
Jerry: Hey Carl and I am a certified ass eater want me to show you?
Carl: Of course
An expert in meeting (avoiding law enforcement) and fucking hookers.
That guy is a certified hooker fucker he really is about it.
A certified good guy is a male paramour that you don’t have sex with, but still allow him to eat your kitty because you know he’ll give it 100% into everything his does. He’s a good guy. He puts your needs in front of his own.
He had a small package but I knew he was a certified good guy, so I let him eat his way to my soul.
Putting hot sauce in a condom after use in sex to ensure the sperm is killed and cannot be used for insemination. Particularly useful in a hookup scenario.
After I hit it I pulled a certified drake classic just to be sure she ain’t gettin no bag from me
Only drink water and will be punished if they drink anything other then water
Guy one: bro don’t mess with them there certified water boys!
Guy 2: what’s a certified water boy?
Guy 1: the most health and crazy people you’ll ever meet
A clan on runescape, that is more like a large male orgy.
clan leader: we are up against the Certified Public Assassins today, so make sure to cover each other.
clan member: why are we going against them again my ass still hurts from the last time?
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The act of having sexual intercourse vaginally, anally, and orally with a woman. May take some time to accomplish, as anally isn't always easy to pull off.
I "Three Hole Certified" my buddy's sister at his wedding. (No shit, I really did it).
Did you "Three Hole Certify" that slut you brought home from the bar?
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