Random
Source Code

gipping and handling

Derisive/resentful term which refers to the perceived act of swindling someone out of money through the misuse/abuse of postage-fees as a sneaky way of making excessive profit or otherwise "coming out further ahead" than is fair. Usually accomplished in two "opposite" ways, either by:

(1) a money-hungry mail-order company's charging excessive postage-rates as compared to the company's actual cost to ship merchandise (such as charging s&h merely based on the order's monetary total instead of the actual merchandise-weight, or claiming that the shipping-weight of a few rubber bands or a matchbook-sized pack of film-splicing-tabs has a shipping-weight of one pound, when any blockhead would know that they could just stuff the feather-light items into an ordinary letter-size paper envelope), especially with the bulk-rate/volume-discount postage deals that big corporations typically get from their shipping-services, or
(2) a stingy/disgruntled customer's purposely sending less funds for postage than the company specifies, with the smirky idea that the company will not want to risk offending the customer and causing him to cancel his entire order --- and then probably take his future business elsewhere --- by their whiningly contacting the customer or returning his order to ask for more funds.

The "gipping and handling" strategy can be a highly effective/successful countermeasure to use when ordering from companies that charge exorbitant postage-fees merely in an attempt to make additional "free 'n' clear profit" from unused postage-funds. What you do is draw up a fairly "large" order --- i.e., one that involves maybe fifty bucks or more (either by ordering one or more expensive items or a bulk-purchase of cheaper items, so that it totals a sizable amount), and thus will be sufficiently "tempting" to the company to make them reluctant to risk "losing" the order by upsetting you in any way. Then you just "accidentally on-purpose" neglect to use the company's "official" printed order-form that came with their catalogue --- you instead just use ordinary lined paper of your own to write out the order, and so your order-sheet no longer contains the company's shipping-rates chart, allowing you to simply write in your **own postage amount** after the subtotal! Oh, sure --- the company is probably gonna include a "debit memo" notation at the bottom of your invoice when they ship your order, but that's of no concern of yours at that point, since --- ha ha ha! --- you already have your merchandise, and so you can simply ignore their blubbery request! Awwww.... you greedy fat-cat CEOs didn't get your extra profits from **me**, the way you do from all of your other "sucker" customers --- too bad, so sad!!

by QuacksO November 22, 2017


Jerk handle

like a dildo, it is a long narrow instrument used to masterbate in either the ass or the vagina

you gotta stick a cock up your ass mate, and make a jerk handle out of it

by a_big_bunghole February 19, 2011


bukakke handle

When a guy with a sweet ass mullet pulls the party in the back into a killer man bun.

We weren't sure how Derek's hair would look when he cut his beautiful long hair into a rad mullet, but his hipster man-bun is now a killer bukakke handle.

by Tittsmcgee July 3, 2017


ejection handle

The aluminum rail frequently located along the walls of the handicapped restroom stall that allows the occupant to gain extra leverage to help them evacuate a tough to eject shit.

Paul: Henry! What are you doing standing here there's tons of stalls available?!?
Henry: I know I know, but I've got to use the handicapped stall since I haven't been able to shit in a week and I'm going to need to use the ejection handle to get this baby out!
Paul: 10-4

by Ambiguousgenitals January 29, 2021


i'd handle

Vernacular, commonly used by males, meaning, "I would like to have sexual relations with that female."

guy 1 "dude did you see her"

guy 2 "yeah, i'd handle"

by ngonzo April 18, 2009


smother handle

A ponytail on a man. Ostensibly to give his attacker a better purchase with which to cram his face into a soft, suffocating surface.

A mullet is occasionally worn in a smother handle style.

I saw this idiot at the grocery store today with Zubaz pants and a smother handle. Do these people not have mirrors? Do they not see themselves being laughed at on America's Funniest Videos every week?

by entropymaam June 15, 2006


Queer handle

A ponytail on a homosexual male. Could also be on a lesbian. (Ex. She could have a strap on dildo attached and fucking her significant other, while holding on to the ponytail of the fuckee.)

Emory fucked Owen in the ass while grabbing Owen’s queer handle. Ex. Kind of like reigns on a horse.

by GA-CHAMP🤙🏻89 May 11, 2021