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turtle choker

A plastic straw

Her: Ugh... you're using a turtle choker?!
Me: Yeah, thot

by Tree Mugger November 17, 2019


asphyxiated turtle head

pronounced- ass fix ee eight ed ter tul hed, which is the state of a mans penis when attempting to pee after having been in an uncomfortably cold temperature for a range of time. Asphyxiated turtle head can even cause pain in the tip and give the sensation of still having urine that needs to be expelled.

"damn this asphyxiated turtle head! ive been forcing out drops of piss for 3 minutes!"

by MercWidaMouth November 10, 2010


Turtle Cub

The Turtle Cub is a epic creature created by @polarbearcari on Instagram along with the help of @alex.royale.high. It is a creature that is a turtle with a polar bear duck taped to its sheep, wry cool indeed. It likes chipotle as a snack

The Turtle Cub gonna eat you

by ALEX THE EPIC CHEATO June 2, 2020


turtle hurdle

When a man is having sex with a woman from behind and, while about to ejaculate, sees the tip of a stool (the turtle) poking from her anus. He quickly pulls out and launches his semen over the poop onto her back (the hurdle).

I was banging my woman from behind and was about to nut when she started to shit herself. I quickly pulled out and did a Turtle Hurdle onto her Tramp Stamp. That shit was nasty but a guy’s gotta blow sometimes.

by JayAddy September 25, 2023


turtle-nappin’

the act of stealing a live turtle.

disambiguation.
*not to be confused with “turtle napping”. (click here for images of sleeping turtles.)

Ricky: “arrested?! oh no, on what charges??”

Bobby: “felony turtle-nappin’.” (the act of stealing a live turtle)

by ryqloud March 7, 2024


Dead Turtle

A term used to describe someone you know who always loses arguments or someone who acts similar to an acoustic turtle but not as acoustic.

Person 1: “Dude I don’t always lose arguments.”
Person 2: “You lose so many arguments that you’re a dead turtle.”

by Totally not Eric_Bob November 12, 2017


Turtle Ticket

A ticket given to you when you are driving too slow.

If you drive underneath 20 miles per hour, you will get a turtle ticket. This is a highway.

by i8toast April 11, 2013