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Typically, victims of textual harassment are most prone to suffer from post traumatic text disorder. Excessive strings of single-sentence or even single-word texts are the most common cause of PTTD. How uninteresting or irrelevant a text or string of texts are is positively correlated to their propensity to traumatize the receiver. Also, the earlier or later in the day these texts are sent, the more likely they are to increase the severity of PTTD symptoms. The signs and symptoms of PTTD are:
-having startled responses to text alerts
-ignoring all received texts due to fear and/fatigue caused by the individual textual harasser
-engaging excessively in activities prohibitive to phone use for the very purpose of avoiding texts
-googling how to block messages without blocking calls
-dreaming of traveling to the location of the textual harasser, smashing their phone, and leaving
Example:
Joe receives sports updates from his friend every single day as early as 6AM and as late as 1AM. Joe starts telling his friend that he's going to sleep earlier and earlier, hoping his friend will be courteous and not text. Joe's friend (the textual harasser) is not courteous and still texts. Joe silences his phone and begins to ignore all texts. Joe feels bad about lying, and instead of confronting his friend, he actually goes to bed when he says he's going to bed.
Joe starts to sleep 12 hours a day, develops bed sores, chronic back pain, and his marriage falls apart. Joe becomes the first person diagnosed with Post Traumatic Text Disorder.
A man who can channel the powers of greyskull and stay awake after getting laid.
Jeff is one of the few...the proud...he's a post coital he-man.
Post Lockdown Stress Disorder (PLSD) is that feeling you get when watching a TikTok that reminds you of lockdown and gives you proper dodgy vibes. This disorder is caused by the repetitiveness of lockdown and the utter boredom that many experienced in the UK’s first lockdown. It can also be caused by spending too much time at home, which may remind you of lockdown.
I have post Lockdown Stress Disorder (PLSD). This TikTok gives me PLSD.
When you buy something expensive, only to find the price was greatly reduced soon after you bought it.
John: "How come mike hasn't come out recently? Last time I saw him he was crying, and contemplating self harm."
Dan : "Dawg he has PTSD. He bought the latest series of Dragon Ball Z last month, but the price got halved the day after he opened it."
John: "Oh I see. Post traumatic Sale disorder. That sucks man, he's probably too sour now too lend me it."
Post-Poop Butt Hurt is when, after a particularly bad poop, your butt hurts. Otherwise known as PPBH.
Person #1: Aw, man, I took such a big dump yesterday that it gave me PPBH!
Person #2: PPBH?
Person #1: Yeah, Post-Poop Butt Hurt
Person #2: Dude, PPBH is the worst!
The emotinal feeling of regret and depression right after one gets done masterbating.
I just spanked my monkey to some scat porn, now I have PMD (Post Masterbation Depression)
See: Dave from Canberra/Captain Obvious/Your Royal Hotness
Dave/Captain Obvious/Your Royal Hotness is a "Post WHore"
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