I Came, I Saw, I Konked Her

Where you ejaculate in her eye and then konk on the head with a frying pan.

Bruce: Hey Heratio where's your girlfriend Farncine.
Heratio: Well actually 'I Came, I Saw, I Konked her' last night and she hasnt woken up.

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She'll be some pup when her tail grows

Donegal Slang for " She/he is doing well/will do well

Or

She is hot.

"See that Nicola? She'll be some pup when her tail grows"

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greasing up her vocal cords

cunnilingus. orally lubricating a woman's vulva.

John: Did Jenny let you get to third base?
Matt: Oh yeah! I was greasing up her vocal cords all night long.

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Choke a bitch and spit in his/her mouth emoji

It is these three emoji's in order. The shocked emoji, you know the one with the blue head and the hands are on its face, the spit emoji but it has the be the one with three drops and finally to finish it off you have the tongue emoji, which represents its mouth. Now to actually define this combo. It is referred to a male or female and bitch is used broadly. Yes its vulgar and its meant to because, creativity and freedom of speech. It may also be used if you are secretly coding something to you significant other to do later on in the evening ;), in other words its a fetish in a emoji form!

P1: Dont piss me off

P2: (enter choke a bitch and spit in his/her mouth emoji)
P1: What the Fuck is that?
P2: Thats what im going to do to you in emoji form of an emoji!

4👍 2👎

Somebody once told me the world was gonna roll me i aint the sharpest tool in the shed she was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb in the shape on an l on her forehead.

The first verse of the song "Smash Mouth" by "All Star"

"Somebody once told me the world was gonna roll me i aint the sharpest tool in the shed she was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb in the shape on an l on her forehead."
Bob: "WHAT IS THIS?"
Sharyl: "GOD'S SINGING VOICE"
Bob: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" *eyes melt out of head*

90👍 10👎

suck a fart out of her ass like a bong hit

When a girl is so bangin that you would do anything to fuck her.

Dude she is so hot I would so suck a fart out of her ass like a bong hit

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I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers

A woman who meets an attractiveness threshold above which you would easily forgive minor transgressions such as eating crackers and leaving the inevitable crumbs in your bed.

The British version "I wouldn't kick her out of bed for farting", while similar in spirit, lacks some of the subtlety of this version.

Lindsay Lohan might have a little nose candy problem, but still, I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers.

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