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When you shatter an empty beer bottle by throwing it.
Hard surfaces work best.
Watch out, incoming German Grenade!
15👍 1👎
When a man is on the dancefloor grinding with some bitch and he gets a boner. The man then takes his penis and pulls it upwards in his pants and buckles it under his belt so there is no buldge and no awkwardness with the bitch... so you can take her home and fuck her.
same as definition...it happens to me all the time and has yet to fail!! i love the german tuck!!
68👍 14👎
One of the most complex and vile sexual acts to be performed... It requires strength, focus and tremendous commitment.
The German Stienburg starts with a man anally plundering a female that is bent over while he is simultaneously holding a tractor tire over his head and using it to do shoulder presses (as in a strongman competition). While pressing the tire and banging the girl he screams out "shiza" every time he makes a press.
After the man makes coitus, he drops the tractor tire on back of the female's head...rendering her unconcious. Finally he lifts up her naked body and proceeds to bench press her... all the while counting his repetitions in a loud, harsh, commanding, German accent. (If you can count in German that is ideal... but if not the accent will suffice).
"Dude, I have to stop by the farm later and borrow a tractor tire, my girlfriend is finally going to let me give her The German Stienburg."
27👍 4👎
The act of backing up into someone's face while they're bending over to tie their shoes, for the sole purpose of farting directly into their face. This act can be performed without removing your pants, but it is hilarious to do it with your pants down. For optimal performance, consider eating Ex-Lax before performing this act to brown-wash your victim.
They say the German Shoelaces will grow hair on your chest -- if it doesn't burn the hair out of your nose, first. Hope you don't get a turd to the eyeball, man!
Whoa! That German Shoelaces gave him a turdy Hitler moustache! Sick, man!
47👍 9👎
The sexual act in which two females simultaneously put their vaginas completely around another persons ears.
Peter was very sad that he had not seen the ocean in a while. He decided to ask two of his friends to give him German Earmuffs so he could at least hear it.
107👍 26👎
Contrary to popular belief, the wide majority of German women DOES shave under their armpits.
"Oh, look at her German armpits!" - "They're not German. They're French."
180👍 49👎
David Hasselhoff was one of the artists who performed on the stage of the big party in Berlin, back in the days the berlin wall - and with it the iron curtain - felt. Since then, the Hoff is a cult icon in Germany.
His song "i am looking for freedom" is still asociated with this happening and its zeitgeist.
Most germans know that its trashy kitsch kult about him, they take it with a smile.
part its a little bit like that chuck norris thing, part it's the remember of the night the divided country became one nation again.
David Hasselhoff wore black leather and drove a speaking computer-car. He was like MADE for the German audience of '89.
thats the tale of the Hoff and the Germans