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Random
Alcohol earned through considerable effort.
Jimbo: The damn store was closed so I had to go two towns over, in the snow, without shoes, while being chased by wolves, to get these distilled beverages.
Eoin: Ooooh, Achievement alcohol. lemme try.
Is what my friend Charles got after 15 shots of wild turkey in 2 hours. Puking is usually consistent for upwards of 6 hours, accompanied by shirtless grunting and dry heaves. Following that is a period of delusional, semi-coherent bouts of swearing, and culminating with an attempt to crawl into my bed. which was denied. Recommendations are to not drink 15 shots of wild turkey, ever. Especially the day before your first server training shift at Olive Garden.
Sorry for spilling your Fettucini Italiano all over your face, ma'am. I got alcohol poisoning.
126👍 25👎
Someone who can maintain an orderly, outward social appearance while their personal life has devolved into complete chaos due to over-drinking. Their friends and family are often impressed with their achievements, while the alcoholic knows that their drinking has lead to a full-blown loss of control and that it is just a matter of time until their behavior blows up in their face. In a bad way.
Emelio's friends/family: " Emelio is about to graduate med school. We are so proud. We only wish we could accomplish as much".
Emelio: "I am a functional alcoholic. Everyone I know thinks I'm doing great but in reality my brain has turned to slush. I can't believe I BS'd my way through med school and got a 3.8 GP because I don't remember any of it. I can't believe I'm almost 30 and have somehow avoided getting a DUI thus far. Everyone thinks I'm so great, but in reality, I'm totally fucking dangerous but I just haven't been caught yet. It's all catching up with me though. It's only a matter of time until I do something really stupid and everyone will realize what a fuck-up I truly am.
22👍 2👎
Someone who apologizes a lot after drinking a lot
When he drinks he is such an apologetic alcoholic.
16👍 1👎
person who knowingly pressures others into excessive alcohol consumption
Scott steamrolled Jeremy into drinking way too much booze last night; he's such an alcohol bully!
18👍 3👎
n. The state of being under 21 and not ever having been intoxicated from any real alcoholic beverage in your entire life.
Dude, I can't wait until my 21st since I've been saving my alcohol virginity!!!
82👍 18👎
A group for people who have the same name as an alcoholic beverage.
Jack: Hi, my name's Jack - Jack Daniels and I've had this name all my life.
All: Hi Jack. Welcome to alcoholics eponymous.
19👍 2👎