Scottish Driver

The act of taking golf club (preferably a driver), gaining an erection, lifting one's kilt and sticking in your anal cavity. Then using your dick as a joystick to aim the golf club and tee-off.

At the driving range yesterday, Johnson pulled a Scottish Driver on us.

pulse driver

This is a person that cannot maintain a steady pressure on the gas pedal in a car. Instead, they go on and off the accelerator repeatedly, causing a terrible experience for all passengers.

"No way, we're not driving with him. He's a pulse driver! It makes me nauseous!"

Cabinated Driver

Combination of Cab driver and designated driver. Used when designated driver is too drunk to hold such responsibilities.

Jim: Yo dude you good to drive.
Fred: No I'm fucking trashed. We need to call a Cabinated Driver.

drivers window

the front drivers side window aka normal sex. when a woman is on her monthly cycle.

all of my windows are working except my drivers window.

Christmas driver

a driver who only drives in the weeks leading up to Christmas. their car is parked and collects dust until next year, preserving the owner's useless driving skills.

They can be spotted amongst other Christmas driver's by:
- failing to indicate the intended direction of the vehicle to others
- failing to interpret traffic lights and signs
- failing to read the speed limit and apply the force required to the accelerator pedal
- failing to stay on the road
- failing to have been born with a brain

Yeah ok dickhead just cut me off! Fucking Christmas driver's man.

grandma driver

hands at 10 & two on the steering wheel and hunched over to see out the windshield

Chris Craig is a grandma driver when he goes on roadtrips

drivers blind

When someone takes a hit while driving and gets smoke in their eyes causing them to go blind for a few seconds. this is a very dangerous disease that has plagued stoners since the invention of the automobile.

driver: Bro pass the blunt!

passenger:Here man it's roasting

Driver:(takes a massive hit way beyond his smoking abilities...so smoke goes everywhere) FUCK! Drivers blind we're going to crash bro!!
passenger:(becomes a stoned hero and grabs the wheel before they crash) I got you bro.