Wing-stalker

A friend or associate who assists in the stalking of your own personal chosen victim of desire.

She was a great wing-stalker and always advised me of when he had turned up at the local pub so that I could make myself glamorous and accidentally bump into him.

Rug Stalker

Adj. A word used to describe a gentleman obsessed with chatting to lesbians in the hope that he might one day make them love him

J: I was buying some watermelons the other day when I happened upon that rug stalker bernard, and guess what?

Q: He was chatting to a lesbian?

J: Exactly!

Stock Stalker

One who obsessively checks the price of recent stock purchases, to the point of losing contact with friends and family.

Dude 1: Sorry I haven't responded to your texts. Due to gas price volatility, I just put $14k into battery stocks.

Dude 2: No problem. I was a psychology major and I recognize Stock Stalker behavior. You might want to seek professional help.

noob stalker

1. A weido / extremely uncool person who consistantly likes and comments on all or majority of your facebook photos or posts when you clearly don't want them to.

Hot Chick:
O.M.G! Today I went to the mall with my BBF, and we bought supppppperrrr cute matching shirts! Be jealous!

xXhardcoremathnerdxX likes this

xXhardcoremathnerdxX:
bring me with you next time ladiess.<33 XOXOXOX

Hot Chick: ugh omg he's such a noob stalker, gtfo!

Siamese Stalker

The same as a stalker, only they make it more obvious and just follow you around. Comparable to a Siamese twin, but not physically connected.

Logan must really like you, 'cause he's acting like a Siamese Stalker!

grade stalker

Someone who is constantly checking their academic grades, looking at them over and over.

Guy: What're you doing?

Nerd: Checking my grades.

Guy: That's like the 10th time today, you're such a grade stalker.

self-stalker

Someone who constantly Googles her/himself and/or has web alerts set to let them know every time their name is mentioned online, to save them the multiple daily Googles of themselves.

Vladimir spent the last 4 hours Googling himself again, even though there's nothing new--what a self-stalker!